Come on now Sally - here, bite on this bullet...

NOOOO

Not that one, sorry, that was a live one...

Tang, her megalomania has gradually been developing and is now totally out of hand, on top of which she has assistants with decidedly sadistic tendencies..........I am checking out of this clinic without delay.

*limps out of clinic clutching a broken jaw and tries to pick up all the teeth blown out by the bullet

Sorry - no can check out without a Doctor's permission, and they are all busy elsewhere at the moment.

Well having read the more recent posts I do agree with you. Book a flight and I will hide you here. They are nowt but a bunch of out of control SADISTS!

May have to amputate the whole toe

tip of the day ... if you haven't eaten yet tonight ... do not read the thread UNSAVOURY DOGS.

And I hope you are all impressed I am doing this with one hand coz Bella has joined me on the big armchair and is dedicatedly licking the other one!

I can't get out Tang. It's like a horror story and they are keeping me prisoner

Perhaps if I throw a load of chocolates on the floor I might be able to escape during the ensuing scramble.

*digs out the TCP* Here you go Bitkin, that will help with the gob and the tootsie.

What a day, raging and calm by turns. Got a call from the academy, Davie was complaining of a sore tummy. He hadn't actually been sick or anything but just felt yuck. He stayed in school though cause I suspected there may have been something bothering him. He mentioned something in passing about some little git going on about him being gay (he isn't btw), and teasing him about it but said it wasn't bothering him much.

Today, well, I find out he has been put out of geography twice (he told me, not the school), so not best pleased that I wasn't told about it, he is now convinced he won't be let back to geography. I have to check on that. Then on his way home he was with a crowd but one of the lads started on him, poured coke over his head. Then his tummy let go and he had an accident. He's cleaned up, had something to eat, just hoping he will go in tomorrow.

I am really starting to worry now, cause he had just started to get his confidence back a little.

Anyway, I've been studying, having a wee break then getting back to it all. Going to go to try to sleep early as well.

Well of course I am going to have to read it now I am not impressed by your one handed typing, because I know full well that there is nothing on earth that would persuade you to move that hand that Bella is licking Have you smeared marmite on it or something? If so, that's cheating.