bad to worse

found out yesterday that i have to go for a brain scan as due to trauma when younger it may have caused damage and/or be causing a tumour to form.

am still backwards and forwards trying to get the ptsd sorted out in three weekly installments but have "homeowrk" to do which is very mentally tiring.

felix has had a huge reaction to his vaccine and his face got so swollen its broken the skin so its sore and itchy and will likely scar - i dont like my boy being in pain, he certainly wont be getting another vaccine again.

ontop of that and everything else thats gone on at home recently i just feel as though im about to crack under the pressure. have been like a zombie the last couple of days, had my personal development review this morning with my old manager - really cheered me up as said id done fantastic in the 6 months i've been here, took my stats etc. back to my current manager to be told the area in which id scored 8 couldnt be right as "nobody gets that" and that if i do the same in my next review i'll have to go on a plan emailed my old manager who said she's talking rubbish and will have a word, so thats probably going to cause a load of aggro and atmosphere... it had made me feel so much better but then after she'd said that felt like i'd been knocked back even further


feel like i need a really good cry but the tears wont come

So sorry things are looking bleak. I can`t offer any practical help but am sending you some hugs to help you get through it all.

Hopefully the beautiful Felix will recover soon, Fudge sends licks to help him.

I am sure the situation at work will sort itself out. Try and use your energy to get yourself and Felix well.

oh chick

You know where I am if you need me. Keep your chin up, I hope the scan goes ok and you never know, your new manager may have just made a mistake and be quite happy to be corrected

Stay optimistic - thinking of you xx

BIG HUGS, hope everything goes well for you at the hospital.
Becky

Thinking of you honey, what a rotten time you're having I hope thinks are looking up soon. Let us know what the scan results are xxxx