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Location: South Wales, UK
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 18,579
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21-09-2006, 06:52 PM
Update (Thurs 21'st) + further ideas
I am writing this update so it's easier for people to keep track of where we are, there's been a lot going on so hopefully it will help.This is what we've done so far:
* We've sent some lovely flowers to John, SB's husband.
* Brundog has created a lovely video memorial which we are going to send to John on CD after a short while - it may be too much for him right now. You can see it here: http://video.google.co.uk/videoplay?...73921103418118
* Patterlad has done this beautiful sketch of SB with her very first Boxer, we are going to send it to John, again in a short while.
* All of your donations have been coming in and although I haven't made a final count yet (as some are being sent in by cheque etc) there is already at least £350 in the fund - I am sure we will get to £500 and if we don't I will make it up to it too, I will also cover the paypal expenses so every single penny we have given goes into the fund. A big heart felt thank you to everyone who has donated, SB would feel so honoured you all thought so much of her.
* I have sent of a sympathy card today from all of us and also two print outs of all of your messages to SB (in the if she could see this thread) so John can leave one near her resting place if he felt it appropriate. If you haven't added your message please do as we will send John an updated version as well. Plus, it's your way/chance to say whatever you wanted her to hear.
I also enclosed a letter I had to quickly write so I wouldn't miss the post, I hope it was ok:
I, and everyone else at Dogsey (Dogweb) is deeply saddened by this loss.
We all loved Lesley very much - she was the core, the centre, of our site. We turned to her for help, for cheering up, for respected opinion, for guidance and for love. We thank you for sharing such a special person with us, who touched so many hearts and helped so many dogs live a healthier and happier life, across the world.
Lesley will always have a special place in my heart, I will miss our chats, her humour, her limitless knowledge, her fairness, her warmth and her reactions to everything I did with Dogsey. A bit like one would seek approval from 'mum'. Indeed she was like a mum to me, telling me to get to bed when I was up late, holding my chin up when it was down and fighting my corner at every chance. I am going to miss her very much.
Lesley's legacy will live on in all of us, and in her words, that are now treasured and saved on Dogsey. She helped shape Dogsey into what it is today, she nurtured it like her own and I can think of no one more fitting to dedicate the site too. She saw the good we were doing - and she will always be a part of that. Every decision I make will have her in mind, and the vision we shared will never be lost. It will be hard because everywhere we turn we will see her, but in time when the pain is easier to cope with, I will treasure and look forward to those reminders and memories.
You will always be welcome at Dogsey, perhaps in time you will visit us and come see just how much she meant to us. We know how much you, Hannah and Jackson meant to her - she loved you all so very much. I know you have been unwell, but I hope you will look after yourself and make a full recovery as that's what she would want. Hannah and Jackson will help you through it, and if you let us, we will too. If there's anything we can do, please just ask - we want to be there for you as she was for us.
We will stay in contact with you John and will be sending you our tributes and messages of condolences from our members soon. In the meantime, I have enclosed two copies of a thread, where I asked, "if we could get a message to Lesley now, what would you say?". There are two copies in case you wanted to leave one copy near her resting place - but if you feel it's not appropriate or fitting then that's no problem, I understand. You may want to wait before reading it as I can appreciate how raw you must be feeling.
Please remember if there's anything you need, we are here for you, and we are all thinking about you, Hannah, Jackson and your family at this very difficult time.
Azz
* Vicki will be sending out another card either tomorrow or Saturday and will be printing out our tributes and messages to send with it. If you haven't added your message for SB's family yet please do so before then, here is the thread: http://www.dogsey.com/showthread.php?t=43928
* Dogsey is going to be dedicated to SB. I can't see anyone more fitting for this, or any other tribute worthy - she was a huge part of this site, put so much in and never asked for anything back. She knew what Dogsey was about, what it's vision is and I firmly believe that after her husband John, Dogs Hannah and Jackson, family and of course dogs, Dogsey was her biggest love. This is so clear to me, especially now. Just look at how much time she spent here, all the articles she wrote, all of us she helped. She did so for many reasons. We were her extended family for one and she treasured her time with us, and our dogs, were her dogs. She cared for each and every one of them and through us, through her advice and teachings, she ensured they lived a happier more fulfilling life. And then she shared our joy with them, through the pictures we posted or the achievements and stories we shared.
There are some people who will fully understand why. Especially those, who, like her, know that so many dogs are unhappy because their owners are not (yet?) able to understand them properly - they just haven't learnt how to yet. Experience comes with time and through knowledge passing from the experienced. Some owners whether new or old don't yet fully understand exactly what is needed to live a harmonious life with their dogs, to appreciate their needs with the care and respect they deserve. SB's postings and articles helped us (especially us newbies) understand our dogs that much better, thus helping them and us, lead happier lives.
I am so grateful she stumbled across our site when it first started. I'm sure all of you will agree dedicating the site to her is the best thing we could do.
A memorial to her will be placed on our homepage and will lead to a page dedicated to her, and why she meant so much to us. I hope you will all agree this is the right decision.
---------------------------------------------------
I guess now we need to decide what to do with the remainder of the fund, for John.
There are a number of options many of you have suggested, here are a few that stood out.
Option 1 - Have Patterlads drawing framed and engraved and sent over? Or maybe after a short while we can ask John to choose a suitable frame over there and we'll pay for it? Along with the cost of engraving? I just thought getting it done there might be better as the frame/glass might get damaged in transit or increase the risk of it getting lost completely?
Option 2 (either or in addition to option 1) - Many of you agreed when I said that I would personally prefer if the money went to SB's husband and dogs rather than a charity - as it would be our last chance to actually give something back to 'her.
We know that John has been quite unwell, and they were planning on a new sit-on lawnmower for him - maybe our money could go towards that? They were also due to change their car, maybe it can go towards that? We know SB had a part time job, so that means there is a cut in income too for the family. I would go as far as to insist that John didn't donate the money to a charity but spent it on himself or their dogs because we know how much they meant to her. Plus in all honesty, I think if she was supporter of any 'cause' you need look no further than yourselves - Dogsey. She was one of our first sponsors and all her time spent helping Dogsey without asking anything in return tells me she would be deeply upset if the money went to a different 'cause' when she thought so much of this one. Hence why I feel she would be much happier if we could use it to 'cheer up' her beloved husband and dogs instead, I know how loving she was and much she loved her husband and dogs - if we can do something for them it will be like doing something for her.
Please feel free to say if you disagree, I know my head is still all over the place so may not be thinking straight. Please also make your own suggestions, none of the ones are set in stone or decided.
Sorry that this is long, I wanted to make sure you all know exactly what's going on.
Thanks again to all of you for everything.
xx
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Location: dogsville
Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 16,141
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21-09-2006, 07:04 PM
In total agreement with it all.
Such a huge hug coming your way.
Dedicating the site to her is a beautiful and inspired idea.
As I said on the other thread, marking the funeral somehow on here may be good, Zuba suggested having a time for us all to 'gather in her memory on here, I thought that would be nice?
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Location: N/A
Joined: May 2005
Posts: 7,780
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21-09-2006, 07:07 PM
I really am overjoyed that dogsey on a whole will be dedicated to the lady herself...and am intregued about the page that will be about Lesley.
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Location: uk
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 2,235
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21-09-2006, 07:11 PM
Originally Posted by Azz 
Thanks Ailsa And Stewart.
Yes I agree, we should take some time out to remember her - anyone have any ideas what time of day we should do this and when?
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Location: Dorset
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 3,319
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21-09-2006, 07:14 PM
On a practical level, sending the picture unframed sounds sensible - less likely to be damaged.
I love the idea of a memorial ride-on mower!
Don't shoulder all the financial add-ons - just give us a shout!
Take care of yourself
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