Morning, morning, morning!

Morning all,

Another cracking day. It’s getting increasingly difficult to say something interesting about the weather. It can stay as uninteresting as this just as long as it likes for me

Got my updated car insurance policy through yesterday. It now covers the Polo from 00:01 on the 3rd May. I suddenly realised that I’m not picking it up until the afternoon on the 3rd, and I’m driving the Passat to do it – EEK! I’ll be getting back onto Elephant to get the Passat reinsured for the extra time needed. It would be just my luck to be hit by something if I didn’t

Another busy day ahead of me, so I’d better get on with sorting out the breakfast for the four-legged ones!

Have a great day everyone, and stay safe

Today’s gem:
A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spends £15,000 and feels pretty good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a paper shop to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the shopkeeper, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I
am?"
"About 32," is the reply.
"Nope! I'm exactly 50," the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question. The girl replies, "I'd guess about 29."
The woman replies with a big smile, "Nope, I'm 50."
Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a chemist on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question.
The clerk responds, "Oh, I'd say 30."
Again she proudly responds, "I'm 50, but thank you!"
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although, when I was young, there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was."
"What is it?" she asks.
He replies, "It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra. Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are."
They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the better of her.
She finally blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead."
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each breast and he gently pinches each n*pple. He pushes her breasts together and rubs them against each other. After a couple of minutes of this, she says, "Okay, okay, that's enough already. How old am I?"
He completes one last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands, and says, "Madam, you are 50."
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, "That was incredible, how could you tell?"
The old man says, "Promise you won't get mad?"
"I promise I won't." she says.
"I was behind you in the queue at McDonald's."

Morning!!!!!!!!!
had a great day at work yesterday so am on a high for today.......watch out kiddies!!!!!!! I'll be bouncing about all over the place!!!!! (it really confuses them when we are bouncey!!!). Looks like it gonna be another day well spent at the beach. it'll be packed down there.
anyway have a great day all
loved the gem!!!!

Morning Vicki,another good day here again too one more day and you will be getting your new car bet you are excited. at todays gem.
Morning all have a good day.

Hi Vicki,

Don't blame you for sorting the insurance, if you're insured nothing will happen, but if not? Thats when sod's law comes into play!

Just having a coffee, before a shower then work, so see everyone later. Its gonna be a gorgeous day again.

Becky

Off to the docs this morning....continuing saga so hope I get some answers.then i might just pop into weigh Watchers bite the bullet and join again.

loved the gem, enjoy the car.

hope everyone has a good one and stay safe.

Rach

morning all

a miracle has happened oldest son is awake at 7.00am he only thinks that there is one of those in a day.






sue

Morning Vicki Morning all. Looks like another lovely day. Sods law being as it is it will pour with rain next week for my holiday away. 1 week to go till I'm 40!
Have a good day everyone

Morning Kitty
Morning Lynn
Morning Becky
Morning Rachel
Morning Sue
Morning Laura

Morning Vicki

Morning All


am in college today in that hot stuffy classroom
but.........................am gonna come home and jump in the swimming pool me thinks

Have a good day

Morning all.
Another day of strange weather here (it's not raining ) lots to do today including seeing my engineer about the builder/house problems and my solicitor about that and the loss of job. Got the letter yesterday, it doesn't make an ounce of sense.
I need to find a magazine that is being advertised on how to make money on Ebay .........
I had my electricity connected to the new house yesterday after 11 months wait but they brought the wrong meter so I am not much further forward. No doubt it will be another few months before they sort that out.....