Good morning everyone !

Morning all,

Really busy at work at the moment, and have to recruit a new technician.

Recruitment of any kind always goes horribly wrong for me. Still, you never know, this time it just may go smoothly

Lots of catching up to do after being out of the office for three days. All I can say is I must be mega-efficient when I’m there, considering the amount of cr*p that appears on my desk when I’m not…..

Have a great day, everyone, and stay safe

Today’s gem :
The Army found they had too many officers and NCOs and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of £1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be.

The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of £72,000.

The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with £96,000.

The third one was a non-commissioned officer, a grizzly old Sergeant Major who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, 'From the tip of my todger to my testicles.'

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big cheques the previous two officers had received. But the old Sergeant Major insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.

The medical officer arrived and instructed the Chief to 'drop 'em,' which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's todger and began to work back. Dear Lord!' he suddenly exclaimed, 'Where are your testicles?'
The old Sergeant Major replied, ' Basra .'

Morning Vicki, morning all,
Hope everything goes well for you today Vicki, me, i'm off for a nice "wind" free walk and hopefully my greenhouse doesnt go "walkabout" today

Have a good day all

Jeanette

Morning Vicki,morning all, lovely calm weather here today.
Hope it all goes well today Vicki.
at todays gem. Have a good day all.

Morning Vicki, morning everybody.

Nice here today if a little cold. Off to Edinburgh shortly - doing interviews today. Now where's the coffee.

Morning Vicki, morning all

Hope you all have a good one

Christine

Morning Jeanette

Morning Lynn

Morning Phil
It's a beautiful day here, BTW

morning all

busy one here again. got lots of catching up to do as went to horsham yesterday for appt for son. still got an essay to write by monday and not around all weekend so that leaves today or tomorrow. guess i am going to have to stop coming on the internet and work.

weather doesnt look so good but it can get better.

have a good day all

sue

Morning Vicki, morning all

A much calmer looking day today and last day of the week for me yipeeeeeee, Mia's school is closed tomorrow so i have the day off

Have a great day all xxx

Morning everyone. the wind seems to have gone thakfully so we might get a peaceful day. I`m certsinly hoping for one after yesterdays chaos.

Got to sort out party bags and cake today ready for youngests party tomorrow.

Morning Christine

Morning Sue

Morning Jules

Morning Rachel