thankyou for your answers you have given me plenty to think about,im not ready to make any decisions yet and am taking one day at a time and try to muddle through but im realistic to know that if i cant manage i will have to make a decision.

if i end up in hospital my x hubby is going to stay at my house to look after the kids and has offered to walk the dog if im ill,so that side of things is sorted

to bringing someone in to help with the dogs behaviour at this stage,they told me they will work out some kind of training package heres the problem i have no idea with being ill how much comittment i can make.

i have already rang a shelter to explain my situation just so i have a back up plan if i cant manage but the fact he has staffie in him lowers his chance of being rehomed,with his health and history they told me he would have no chance of them even taking him also the fact he cant stand being even in the garden alone putting in kennels would be cruel.

And this is why I answered as I did.

When considering options it is not just about the dog, but the environment and the ability of the owner to implement a programme with least danger posed to those at risk.

Good luck.

I had a GSD x Akita who was brilliant indoors but a nightmare outdoors!! He attacked, lunged, pulled and snarled at any animal in sight. He was always ok with humans tho - soft as a teddy bear.
I couldn't even think about letting him go off lead and as he was such a big strong dog I was serious worried about the damage he could do. I took him to various behaviourists etc all to no avail, he also had a re-occuring ear infection which after tests showed it was an allergic reaction infection! and he was always really itchy.
As a last ditch attempt before seriously considering having him PTS I took him to a behaviourist who dealt with 'dangerous dogs'
This woman asked me to handle my dog, lift his lips and feet etc she then brought in 3 different dogs which eyeballed him in varying degrees from none at all to full on stare and Simba didn't retaliate. I couldn't believe it! Then she asked me if I'd fed him and I said no as it was quite a long car journey, what I fed him and I said commercial dry food, she said was it coloured I said yes - That's possibly it then she said, you're dog may be allergic to the colours and preservatives in food. She advised me to go home and get rid of all food with additives and give him nothing but chicken for a week and see how he goes, then slowly introduce different meats, veg etc but no additives what so ever.
I did this and within a week he'd calmed down, I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen the change myself!! Within a month he'd stopped scratching and his ear never again flared up.
She described his behaviour as doggy ADHD brought on by additives. If anyone ever gave him anything with any in he'd flip again.
The vet was upset though as they didn't want to research what he was allergic to as they liked the fact that I was back there every 3 months or so for more anti-biotics and pain killers!! Needless to say I have a different vet now !!!!
I'm not saying that's what yours has but it is possible for dogs to get ADHD or similar symptoms to it.