Trouble is, it takes such a long time for them to grow brains....

Snorri

It's really dangerous what your daughter is doing Tillymint (but I guess you know that). If she isn't listening to you then I guess there's not much you can do about it. It's illegal for someone to pierce/tattoo someone (for piercings I think it's 18 years old but might be 16) that young and is classed as assault.

If she's done her lip herself she needs to watch out for septeceamia (sp?)/blood poisoning which is potentially fatal.

Probably the only way she is going to stop is if one of the piercings seriously affects her health.

It must be really difficult for you. I really feel for you x

Oh dear. first thing, do you know where she got the tat from? for obvious health reasons you need to know, now Inkliveeva on here would be the best one to advise on this, but it is illegal for a shop to tattoo somone under 18 years old.. so if it was a legitimate shop, you need to report it, but again Inkli would be best to advise,
if its not a reputable shop, then health issues need to be looked at,
piercings are a health risk to if not done properly,

as to her attitude to it all, Its a hard one, if shes going to play the im 16 soon its my body I will do as I like sort of card,
but you could take her aside, explaine you understand she is an adult and can do what she likes to her body,
but there is a child in the house also, who sees her as someone to copy and look up to,
ask her if she could discuss any further things she may be tempted to do with you, so that you can deal with the yonger of the two,

poss just giving her that inch of "ok yes your an adult" and as such you have a responsiblity to the 14 year old in the house may help...

girls eh....glad I have a lad.

When they throw that up at you , then its time to make them realse if they want to be classed as an adult , then you are willing to treat her as one.

She has to start taking responsibitly for herself

She cleans and washees her own room /clothes... all the things you do for her, pocket money.. and so on..

As in life adults have to earn their own way, and if she is not going to listen to you . then you are going to treat her like one.

Its difficult when they go behind your back and do these things.

What the schools stance on these percings... does she have to take them out for school!

I remember when my daughter wanted a tattoo (she was 15) I refused point blank, I HATE THEM... it was not till she was around 21 she told me she had gone ahead and got one on the sole of her foot... it was the only place she thought I would not see it rather pointless really as no one else did either

She now has one on the small of her back, but she has now grown out of it ..(thank god) mind she did promise she would never get one where you could see it.

as long as the piercings are done safely and she looks after herself, is it really a problem?

its only a fashion statement, all teens go thru a phase

I think the worst part of this "teen stage" is the after effect,

some of these piercings leave scars when removed, {home done piercings more so}

if she has a few of these on her face, it could have an effect on her later in life {even down to what jobs she may or may not get}

Mind, as the saying goes , do as I say , not as I do, comes to mind..

My cousin pierced my ears, when I was 16 , with a darning needle and a potato

i still think if you view the matter from the teen culture point of view, peace would more likely prevail, meaning issues such as the one you highlight are more likely to be addressed

I am not so sure, as they will push the boundaries further out , as you give in to one.. they will find another to challenge you with

oh dear.....your nuts jackie,

yup your right there, if tilly could talk with her daughter about these things, she may not win the fight to stop her doing it, but she could insist its done by a proffessional, she could also insist that she pays for it herself, which could buy a little time while her daughter saved up.