Just wanted to add my experience really - not to make judgements or give advice to others.

I had Ben on 17 December 2007, he wasn't due until the 20th February 2008 - so he came at 31 weeks! It was all rather traumatic as initially my waters broke at 28 weeks I think it was and so we pretty much knew if he came then he wouldn't survive. Thankfully he stayed put for another three weeks but then I started to bleed. I was rushed back to Glasgow - as the Borders didn't deal with babies potentially as young and Edinburgh had no beds! I was in for two days (bleeding) before being given an emergency section. Not what I wanted really but how it had to be, to save me and Ben.

He was absolutely tiny (3lbs5oz) and spent two months in the SCBU initially in Glasgow and then he was transferred to the Borders.

The Glasgow nurses were useless tbh. I was obviously pretty distressed and emotional after what we had been through. I spent three days on a ward with other new mums who all had their babies with them, while mine was in the ICU The morning after he was born, I wasn't even told whether he had survived the night or not until mid-morning It was very upsetting.

I was told that Ben needed breast milk (which is how I had intended to feed him anyway) but no-one gave me any advice or support on what I was supposed to do about that Ben is my only child - so it was all totally new to me.

Thankfully when we were transferred to the Borders I was given loads of advice and support. The nurses were amazing. I will never forget having to use the "boobalator" (as my hubby nicknamed it lol) every two hours (day AND night) in order to express milk to be given to Ben through his tubes. I felt a bit like a dairy cow () but actually it gave me a real sense of being able to do something for my son. When he was big enough he was able to breastfeed from me, and thankfully it all came quite naturally to us both.

I do believe in the saying "breast is best" - as Dani says, it is what boobs were designed for However, I do think that new mums have an awful lot to deal with, so shouldn't be given a hard time if they decide they want to feed formula instead. Help, advice and support should be available, but there should also remain the choice.

Yes, breastfeeding is great, but surely it's individual choice

It's not the be all and end all, is it? Many formula fed babies are fine.
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'Breastapo'.....that made me LOL! Sorry....

Exactly, individual choice......you do what is best for you and your baby, breast may be best, (for some) but life is not always black and white, breast is not best, if baby is not satisfied , and mother is stressed .

Having the benefit of adult children that have managed to become adults, without breast milk, being fed for the first 2 years of their life , I can give you an long term opinion, they have survived, believe it or not, and developed into normal healthy human being.

I get a little fed up of hearing the younger generation, of trying to teach thier grandmothers to suck eggs.

Any young mother faced with the breastaspo dictating, just remember children survive, whether they are fed by bottle o r breast.... Do what is right for you, and don't feel you have to listen to others who try to tell you you are failing as a mother because you choose not to breast feed.

Oh and no one told me anything about whether Erin had made it through the night (another one dumped on a maternity ward to listen to women being brought up from delivery, congratulated and told how well they'd done - I assume by contrast that means I did crap and was unworthy of congratulations). I was just dumped up there, naked from the waist down, and left to lie in my own blood - sobbing all night. I still have to listen to that every single night and it hurts every single time I do so... and that's before everything that went on in the birth to deal with.

There are a lot of other issues going on surrounding the birth and the hospital's mishandling of numerous things that have a very strong complaint pending given time once I'm out of here.

However considering I failed in carrying her to term, failed in carrying the pregnancies that came before her, failed in terms of labour and birth (horrific story there I can't even begin to deal with) - another failure and denial of options open to others would be about par for the course really.

Oh and no one told me anything about whether Erin had made it through the night (another one dumped on a maternity ward to listen to women being brought up from delivery, congratulated and told how well they'd done - I assume by contrast that means I did crap and was unworthy of congratulations). I was just dumped up there, naked from the waist down, and left to lie in my own blood - sobbing all night. I still have to listen to that every single night and it hurts every single time I do so... and that's before everything that went on in the birth to deal with.

There are a lot of other issues going on surrounding the birth and the hospital's mishandling of numerous things that have a very strong complaint pending given time once I'm out of here.

However considering I failed in carrying her to term, failed in carrying the pregnancies that came before her, failed in terms of labour and birth (horrific story there I can't even begin to deal with) - another failure and denial of options open to others would be about par for the course really.

thing is you haven't failed at all, you have a gorgeous wee girl and thats what you have to think about nothing else....