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Strangechilde
Dogsey Senior
Strangechilde is offline  
Location: Scotland, UK
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 693
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20-10-2013, 11:39 PM
Ha, Puzzymunkle! Maybe that is his problem. I can't help him with that, alas. Nor would I really want to...

The dogs, however, have been good as gold! They always are; I just notice it more under threat of shouty.
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Wysiwyg
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21-10-2013, 05:37 AM
My advice would be to move if you have the choice.

I've been in a similar situation - believe me, neighbour problems can build to the intolerable level very quickly and your home can become your prison when it should be your castle!

It's not being weak to move - it's being sensible and not involving yourself in possibly years of fighting, even legal problems.

Hopefully he will not be there long, but if it looks as if he's going to stay - honestly, plump for keeping your health and sanity, and leave.

I never regretted leaving and now have lovely neighbours

Wys
x
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mjfromga
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22-10-2013, 01:04 AM
AGH! Gosh he's such a "bouche dag" isn't he? Don't move! That means he wins... he's trying to run you out of your residence because he doesn't like you and your dogs.

He's keeping you awake on purpose, being mean for no reason on purpose, and just being a thorn in your side on purpose. All of it in an attempt to run you off.

I am not one for avoiding trouble, though... so maybe you should listen to Wysiwyg if at all possible
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lore
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22-10-2013, 12:13 PM
If things are getting bad then a word with the owner about his behaviour might be wise. Also pre-empt any problems by a word to the police. That way if the guy does kick off you have back up.

Also record incidents, anything at all involving this guy. If things get really bad then you have a written record of what happened, when it happened etc.

I don't see why you should have to move because of one rotten egg, it's really not fair.

We had trouble with the neighbours this year, never had any problems before, but it turned out to be down to one neighbour two doors over causing trouble. Was after the last one where next door and her had a stand up fight in out in the street when she moved out and myself and next door haven't had any problems since.

I hope this issue resolves for you.
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Strangechilde
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22-10-2013, 04:02 PM
Thanks all. My husband has made some delicate inquiries to the owner, who is a lovely guy, but not very communicative. Wysiwyg and Mfromga-- we may indeed be moving soon. But rest assured it isn't because of this guy. It's because we really want more space, with a safe garden of our own, especially as the dogs are getting on now-- youngest, and biggest, turns 7 this month-- and while we were just kind of nosing around to see what's available we came across a place we really like. We are in negotiations now, so please wish us luck!

We are not confrontational people, either of us, and we won't willingly enter into a situation where someone has to 'win'. He's been out a lot so we've been able to a avoid him generally; not sure where the kids are but I've not seen hide nor hair of them, so they must be staying somewhere else. Word is he's only here temporarily, at the grace of the owner. I genuinely don't think he had any thought in his mind regarding us in terms of his screaming girl party-- just a typical narcissist, he wouldn't even think it might get on someone else's nerves. He has other neighbours, not just us.

If I know he's in, I am still audio recording every coming in and going out, just in case. I'd recommend doing the same for anyone in a similar situation.

Do wish us luck on the new place! Neighbours will be invited to the housewarming, with certain notable exceptions.
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Lynn
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22-10-2013, 04:32 PM
Good luck with the new property fingers crossed for you.
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Strangechilde
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24-10-2013, 03:01 PM
Well, finally the neighbour beat us home. We came in at 11pm, with barking for about 2 minutes, since Old Dog spotted us coming up the road from the window-- no yelling! Hopefully the guy has settled down. Took them down for a pee at 1AM, because Little Dog asked. They were the essence of quiet. Hoping this guy has calmed down! We're still negotiating on the new property. It'll be ace if we can get Big Dog his own garden before the snow hits.
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Tang
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24-10-2013, 03:06 PM
Originally Posted by Strangechilde View Post
Thanks all. My husband has made some delicate inquiries to the owner, who is a lovely guy, but not very communicative. Wysiwyg and Mfromga-- we may indeed be moving soon. But rest assured it isn't because of this guy. It's because we really want more space, with a safe garden of our own, especially as the dogs are getting on now-- youngest, and biggest, turns 7 this month-- and while we were just kind of nosing around to see what's available we came across a place we really like. We are in negotiations now, so please wish us luck!

We are not confrontational people, either of us, and we won't willingly enter into a situation where someone has to 'win'. He's been out a lot so we've been able to a avoid him generally; not sure where the kids are but I've not seen hide nor hair of them, so they must be staying somewhere else. Word is he's only here temporarily, at the grace of the owner. I genuinely don't think he had any thought in his mind regarding us in terms of his screaming girl party-- just a typical narcissist, he wouldn't even think it might get on someone else's nerves. He has other neighbours, not just us.

If I know he's in, I am still audio recording every coming in and going out, just in case. I'd recommend doing the same for anyone in a similar situation.

Do wish us luck on the new place! Neighbours will be invited to the housewarming, with certain notable exceptions.
I wish you ALL THE LUCK IN THE WORLD with that possible 'move' for you. If you are not confrontational people I don't see why you should have to lower yourself to his level or try to 'get the better of him' or turn it into some sort of 'contest' or 'war of wills'. Life's too short for that stuff. You are obviously 'better than that'. And 'better than him'. In these sort of situations I always say 'after all said and done - I would rather be ME than be THEM'.

So yes keep records but don't let this take over your life any more than it has already.
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Strangechilde
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24-10-2013, 03:44 PM
Thanks Tang!

I'm sure this guy is 'better' than us. He has a really nice car. His clothes are nice. He probably has way more money than we have. But you know what? I don't care. If it slams him down to stay in a *flat*, where he might have to encounter *other people*-- well, I'm sure that's awfully upsetting for him, that he has to hear life happening sometimes. Boo. Hoo. Hoo. Hoo.

I just don't like being intimidated or yelled at. If he's stopped doing this, great! Still looking forward to the move... and will miss the great neighbours.
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Florence
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24-10-2013, 04:49 PM
If you can and want to move, this will probably be the best solution. Some people are just out to make your life miserable. It clearly puts a lot of stress onto you and your husband, and surely also your dogs. Chances are, that this d***head won't change and will continue to make your life hell. You could try talking to him, perhaps with a mediator, or talk to the police but from experience this doesn't always help much.
I've moved so many times in my life, I can't even count it anymore. We never moved directly because of neighbours, but our with to move usually came as a relief from horrible people around our flat.

At the moment, my boyfriend and I (and Ella) life in a top floor flat, and the mainly drunk neighbours downstairs talk, shout, scream, slam doors etc. all night on weekends. It upsets Ella a lot and she starts barking.. They also told me she howls 'all the time, all day long' which I found out not to be true as I filmed her when I left her alone. However, she does bark when she hears them slam doors, which I think is fair enough.

Anyway, I really feel for you and hope you find a solution soon! Moving to a nice house with garden etc. might be the relief you're looking for, I know it would be for me

Good luck!
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