Bird!

OH NEBBERLY HEFFERLANT PACKA TUNGEN SEGGERBAI TUDOR CIR CUTS....

DER AGGY?

Off she went with a tru...er...yes, Seren a PUPPYDOG! ?

DER AGGY, WOT WAS DAT NOISE WOT WE DID HEAR INNA TREES DIS MORNIN' DAT WENT LIKE DIS "DRRRRRRRRRR!" LIKE DAT.

Hmmm? Oh! Dat...dammit...that was a woodpecker, Seren a PUPPYDOG!

A WOODY PECKA. RIGHT CHEW ARE DER AGGY. A WOODY PECKA.

DER AGGY?

Yes, Seren a PUPPYDOG! ?

WOTS A WOODY PECKA DER AGGY?

It's a bird, Seren a PUPPYDOG! And it eats little insects that live inside trees, so it has to hit der ...dammi! the trees really hard and fast with its beak.

YOU'RE MAKING DIS UP TO MAKE ME LOOK STOOPID, AN' I ALREADY STOOPID, DER AGGY. I DID HIT A TREE WID MY HEAD JUST DER ONCE AN' IT DID REELY HURT AN' I COULDN'T SEE AN' I FELL OVER. IF A WOODY PECKA HIT DER TREE DAT FAST IT'D FALL OFF DER TREE AN' BEND ITS BEAK INTO A PRETZEL.

Ah, Seren a PUPPYDOG! I'm not making it up. See, it has special bits round its beak and its head to stop its brain getting damaged, and so it can hit really hard without getting hurt!

AH DAT MAKES SENSE DER AGGY! UDDERWISE IT'D GET ALL CONFUSLED AN' STOOPID.

Yes, it possibly would, Seren a PUPPYDOG!

AN' END UP WRITIN'S DER STORIES ON DER DOGSEY ABOUT HAVIN' A TALKIN' DOG

Yes, it probably....wait...what?

Seren, you have hit the nail, or the tree, right on the head.
Lucky you hearing a woodpecker, you'll know what it is next time, and no more walking into trees and banging that head, otherwise who knows where it will end. Possibly making up stories

How much wood can a woodpecker peck?

Answer
A woodpecker would peck all the wood he could peck if a woodpecker could peck wood

Woodpecker, more commonly known as a headbanger.

Oh Seren a puppy dog you are such a lucky girl having a daddy who explains everything to you. Keep enjoying your walks.