Hello (coat chewing )

Hi all, My name is Lisa I am married and have two children 18 and 21 and 2 flat coated retrievers Merlin 2 and Arthur just 1 they are both entire.
I am having problems with Arthur as he seems to be suffering with some form of separation anxiety, but it isn't always constant. He chew poor Merlin's coat all round his neck and shoulders, it looks like I have been hacking him with scissors.
I thought it was improving a few weeks agao as I had been putting them both in T shirts at night and been using a DAP diffuser and rescue remedy, then when we took them on holiday with us it all started up again, I think related to them having to be alone in the car while we went to eat etc.
Merlin also has a skin issue under his chin he gets spot which flare up and bleed and increase, he has has antibiotics earlier this year which did clear it, I have kept it at bay using "clear complexion" herbal tablets but been to vet today as it is quite bad again and Im wondering if its stress related dues to Arthur chewing at him. I feel I have failed my boys as since having Arthur I have worked less (only work in the evenings and one morning) and generally someone is around, so I feel quite innocently that I failed to teach him how to be alone and now it seems a mammoth task.
I am hoping to find so helpful hints and advice on this forum.
Many thanks
Lisa

Hi Lisa and welcome. Sorry that you are having separation anxiety problems with one of your dogs.
I have two entire boys (18 month old littermates) and they have been treated exactly the same. I no longer work so have been fortunate enough to be here 'all the time' for training etc. One of them is absolutely fine being left the other one has real separation anxiety problems. One is very sensitive and the other not. To me it just proves that a lot of their temperament and anxieties etc is in their make-up, so please don't feel you have failed them!!
If I could say you could wave a magic wand as far as the SA is concerned, I would have done it myself. I have tried everything suggested and he is a little better, but I know he would become hysterical if we all went out and took his brother with us. Providing he has his brother with him, he will settle after a minute or so and just sits by the door waiting for someone to come back.
Poor Merlin, not much fun for him having Arthur chewing him but I presume if her really objected to it, he would 'have a go' at Arthur.
Fortunately mine don't chew each other (just objects ) but good luck and I hope you can sort out Merlin's skin problem.

Hi Jenny, Thank you for your reply, how do you find it having two entire males? I have always had bitches before so this is very different for my, I do find the boys more affectionate, but also such babies! another issue is whether to have one or both neutered? but not sure if it would alter Merlin now he is 2, I wonder if it would/could help with the incessant scent marking that he does? Arthur does less of this, but I wonder if it would help his anxiety at all, but then again I don't want to interfere with things unless I have to.
I have started putting Arthur in the kitchen ( it is small and has no door only a baby gate across) when we leave them together, and so far this seems to be OK, I haven't resorted to doing it at night yet, see me being soft, I think they like to be together!
Thanks again Jenny, just nice not to feel so alone with it x

A book I've personally found helpful for SA is Nicole Wilde's "Please don't leave me!" - if you have a Kindle or download a Kindle app for your PC, the ebook version is a fair bit cheaper than the book.