Life without Tara Banana...

Loss.....I have never ever felt anything like it, the feeling of utter loss, of having your heart ripped out of your chest and not being able to breath or want to sometimes.

When I got that phone call at 2.30am and those dreadful words were uttered 'I am sorry Mrs P I have some sad news, Tara has gone' I went into shock...how can my Banana girl be gone??? How can she go from being an absolute Hooligan at 5pm to being 'gone' now?

I screamed, wailed, tore at my hair and demanded God bring her back, how dare he take her away from us, how I hated the world at that moment, nothing could console me, poor Gary tried so hard, but I just kep crying out 'bring my baby back'..

After the shock, then the utter devestation, we spent those early hours feeling so utterly alone, when a human dies, you go into 'organise' mode, sorting out phoning relatives, notifying banks etc, when a dog dies you can do nothing but wallow in your own grief and loss.

We went outside to look up at the stars and watch as Dawn came, and the first birdsong filled the air, and I shouted out 'why birds are you singing?' my little girl is dead, then the sun started to shine and I shouted out 'How can you shine so brightly, when my little girl's light has gone out?'...how dare the world go on without her...how dare it....

Then the messages of support started to come in from all over the UK and world, people had got to know my 'little big' girl through her diary that was posted on several boards and I was truly stunned at the number of people who's lives she had touched...you cannot believe how these simple messages have helped us, and although we haven't read them in detail as the pain is raw, just knowing that other people are sharing our loss helps us.

We knew that Wolfhounds had short life spans, we knew that with Tara's rare conditon we were walking an unknown path, but we didn't realise just how short that path would be

Would we do it all again if we had the chance?

If I have to answer honestly, then at this moment in time I don't know...the pain is way to raw.

Would I swap 10 years of my life for 1 more day with my 'Banana'..absolutely yes..

This is Day 1 of Life after Tara.....but we'll get through it, one day at a time, until we can smile and speak fondly of her without tears, and have laughter instead of pain in our hearts..

Would we have another Wolfie...who knows...nothing could ever replace Tara...she was one in a million...

Tara Banana, forever a puppy, you will always be my Banana baby

Beautifully written and very touching....may all our thoughts guide you through these difficult days.We are there behind you and beside you .Whenever you may stumble we will stand you back up and carry on with you.

I cant imagine what your going through to lose her so quickly and at such a young age.
Just remember there are a lot of people thinking of you right now xx

im am so sorry i cant understand how you must be feeling as i have never gone through it yet but i know the pain must be so much as im sitting here writing this i m looking at my babies and dont know how i will cope without them its such a scary thought.

I am so sorry for your loss xxx

Sleep tight Tara xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Life is so cruel.

I hope the day comes when you can think of her and smile, until then (((hugs))) xxx

I was so sorry to hear about your loss and as others have said I can't begin to imagine what you're going through.

I hope it starts to get easier for you and that you can look back on your time with Tara and smile and remember what a truly special girl she was.

Try to keep your chin up and as you said she touched so many lives and we're all thinking of you.

Its so difficult to know what to stay other than how utterly devastating it must be. Sending a huge hug to you xx

I am so sorry for your loss. We felt the same when we lost our whippet Jack last year at Easter and can still see him now everywhere in the house.

Karen

It is amazing how one dog always "gets" us......

Hugs honey - I've been where you are and I know how you feel

x0x0x

Oh Littlelab, I have read your devestating update but this is the first time I have been able to post as I just couldn't face it before then. I am so sorry you have no idea. I remember you asking about Wolfies when Tara first bounced into your life and I warned you that their life span was short and you had to be prepared for that. I had no idea how short Tara's would be. I am so sorry. I wish I had something to say that would help the pain but I am empty. All my love and hugs to your and all your family. I am so glad you shared such love with her, and so sad it is over so soon.
Am here on PM if you need a chat or anything.
xx