Is my puppy afraid of wearing her harness or going outside?

Hi everyone I'm new here and wondering if anyone could give me some advice, I have a gorgeous 14 week staff cross american bulldog and I'm a little concerned about a recent change in behaviour.

**I apologise for the very long post! I just felt the need to give some background info and explain what has been going on, thanks for reading**

On friday she could go outside for the first time we just took her for a short one round the block and she loved it! No problem with harness at all. Then the next day we were getting ready to go on a walk, I went to get my coat and when I came back I seen my boyfriend had put her harness on and left the room, she was lying on the living room floor shaking and wouldn't stand up when I took hold of her lead, I asked my boyfriend what was wrong and he shook it off saying it was because she didn't want to stay in the flat once she had her harness on, I picked her up and took her out our door sure enough she ran out tail wagging! We took her the park and I was such a proud mum she adored being out, we let her off the lead for the first time she ran to each of us when we called, she fetched her ball and brought it back to us, dropping it at our feet, she got back on her lead no problem and even let to enormous rottweilers sniff her, it was such a happy positive experience for all of us.
Yesterday it didn't go so well, my boyfriend put her harness on and took her outside, she got out of the path and lied down it was clear she didn't want to go any further, so he turned around and took her back she got near the front door and lied down she didn't want to come in either! He tried to get her to walk a couple more times and in the end he picked her up and brought her back inside where she was back to her usual self.
Then today things became distressing, she ran away when he first tried to put her harness on, a couple of minutes later she let him do it. He forgot something and went in the kitchen to get it (he did leave her in the hall but the kitchen door was open so she could of gone in) I came out of the bedroom to fine he slumped in the corner head down tail between legs shaking vigorously so I picked her up and she continued to shake on my knee for 15 minutes, then my boyfriend took her out and again she ran out of our flat door. When they got back he let her off the lead and again I found her in hall lying down shaking tail between legs, I picked her up and took her into the living room she jumped on my knee and stayed there shaking for at least 20 minutes I wrapped her up in a blanket and she fell asleep she's been asleep for about 2 hours, every now and then she lifts her head up and nods back off.
Its not only this that's bothering me though, she has been a very happy lively and boisterous puppy since we got her, however the past week she has been quite timid and she jumps at the slightest sound hiding under the table, she's never been as bad as tonight though.
Does anybody have any idea what is the matter? We are with her most of the time there has been no traumatic experience I know of and as I said before our first works where extremely positive.
We live in a top floor flat so she doesn't have access to a garden at the moment, but we do live right next to a park.

Sounds like she's nervous of your boyfriend, possibly? So far each of the incidents you have listed involve him. Is there any chance that he's been a bit impatient with her...? Dogs pick up very quickly on how we are feeling at any given moment...

No offence intended, but it does sound - to me - as though he's making her nervous.

Did you take her out and about (carrying him) prior to his first outing on the lead?

What is she like if he is carried outside:
a - with her harness on?
b - without her harness on?

Is the harness fitted correctly?

Does she show resistance to it being put on?

What did you do to introduce the harness to her?

What breed is she?

What's her name?

I wondered the same as TabithaJ I wondered if your BF has a harsh voice, maybe when trying on the harness and she won't stand still or something like that.
Would he unknowingly of pulled her towards him when trying to get it on, which if she is sensitive may of taken it as a harsh/rough experience. Sorry not suggesting your BF is anything but kind, but sometimes trying to get a young boisterous pup ready to go out can frustrate one person where another will just be patient.

I would suggest you do the harness for a time as see if you can not reassure her that all is fine
Best wishes

Thank you for your reply, I think you are spot on, just as I had finished reading your post on cue kaya stood up and come to me but she would not go near him. I was thinking about the harness and going outdoors but looking back tonight as he was going out he walked into our flat door which has just been painted *he got really angry and shouted before he come back in* so stupid of me not to have realised just because it wasn't directed at her. Thank you so much, my boyfriend is upset now he loves her so much and doesn't want her to be scared of him, so now we can fix the problem! Xx

He really needs to think that she is a baby and obviously will not understand what is required of her. I have 4 dogs and I have a rule here ....which everyone has to abide by

Calm, Patience, no raised voices and defo no smacks.

You and your BF will be rewarded ten fold in return as she grows and knows that you two are the ones to trust

In the meantime I think he will have to grovel with some lovely tastey treats and a play

Hi Brierley

Yes she went out lots of times being carried, she was really good didn't try to get down or anything, we didn't carry her with the harness on but she has been out on nice walks with the harness before.
We didn't really do anything to introduce her to the harness but at first she didn't resist it has only been today she wouldn't let him put it on.
She is staff cross bulldog and her name is kaya
Thanks for posting x

So hopefully mystery solved

Maybe remind your boyfriend that dogs are incredibly sensitive - they can read us FAR better than we can read them

If your boyfriend is feeling tense, whatever it may be about, your dog can sense it.

Sounds like you both really love her, so hopefully all will be great now

Thanks all for the posts, I was blind not to see it really you are all obviously very experienced you knew straight away and weren't even here to see the full story, thanks again. Will try again walking tomorrow, calmly this time x

Glad its sorted...... have a good walk tomorrow xxxx