I quite understand, coz now I realise you must be a home carer to this old lady, and then of course, I quite understand how this lady must feel, she obviously wants to go before the dog, so that she has her companion around her like she always has, it's such a very sad situation isn't it.

I don't suppose your boss (if you work for a care agency maybe) could be of any help with all of this? It might not be the first time they've come across a situation like this, and could send the relevant people down to have a chat with the old girl who is trained in dealing with this type of thing. It might actually be better than what she might have heard from her vet? Some of these help the aged councillors have quite a knack of "getting through" don't they? Coould be worth a try?

I said what I said in my previous post coz I didn't actually understand the whole circumstances, so of course you can't do what I suggested doing, that would be out of order, I thought it was just somebody you knew kind of thing. Very difficult for you. I think I'd be contacting the Help the Aged and see if they have somebody who might be willing to pay her a visit and then they would see the poor dog for themselves and give you some back up!

All the best, I know it must be upsetting you, let alone the other part of the work you do!

If the old lady in question needs a home carer then it may be that she is thinking of her own situation as well as the dog's and feels she is doing the right thing.

Many very ill and distressed people still have the will to live and so feel that their elderly, ill, distressed dog is the same and so has the chance to have that life if they are still showing some signs of what they once were

It may be that a sympathetic chat over a cup of tea will help the owner to see what she is missing (if indeed the vet has exhausted all options for making the dog well).

It's easy to point fingers and tut tut, but often a fuller picture is required and some empathy for the owner too.

Try to offer a listening ear, investigate all the facts and if you still feel that the dog has no chance of return to a quality of life, then guide the owner rather than tell her.

A very distressing situation all round by the sound of things

Sorry forgot to say - I am her dog-walker.

Today has been awful. The owner took her to the vet last night and was told she had had some kind of stroke and would be better in a couple of days.

This poor dog was lay in the hallway today with the shoerack tipped over where the dog has leant against it trying to get up and failed. She could have been lay there for hours as my first visit to her was 4 hours prior to this. I pulled her up onto her feet but if I took my hand away from her legs she started to fall. I had to space her back legs apart in order to balance her and then she staggered on the carpet and collapsed on her bed.

I rang the vet -in confidence - although I've no doubt it won't be in confidence. After my conversation with them I was fuming. I doubt they have even brought up the subject of euthanasia. I may be wrong but when they said she could be better in a few days I wanted to say "what from old age and anorexia?" I am just so upset and think they are stringing her along for more money.

I have once again contacted the owner and said the dog cannot be left but I lay her on the carpet with her water bowl in reach. The life has left this dogs eyes and I kept checking to see whether she was breathing. It would have been a Godsend if she weren't.

I am totally helpless to help this dog. If it were a person I would have dialled 999 for an ambulance. I feel totally drained.

My feelings too Oh you poor thing what you've been through today with her, itmust have broken your heart

I can't believe those vets They surely must have seen the state of this poor creature when she took her in, let alone the fact that they've diagnosed that she's had a stroke which she probably has We can only hope she will sleep forever in peace tonight hey?

If you're her dog walker I'm assuming she has other dogs you walk then, coz I'm darn sure you wouldn't be walking this poor mite?!

I honestly don't know the answer, maybe somebody does, so I'll leave it to them, but in my heart, I know what I'd be doing

Helena, I used to walk this dog and her other dog that recently died.

Obviously this dogs walks have got shorter until they were really just a toilet break and bit of company. Also to feed her and fill up her water.

Up until the other dog died she could stroll round the block and has had a host of health problems but all being kept under control with meds. Her back legs have been very weak for a while but since her companion died she has barely eaten and got weaker and weaker.

So this is what is left of this shell of a dog. Just weeks ago she would wag her little tail when she saw me and hobble to the door ready for a little stroll just up the road. She then stood looking around bewildered. It seemed she was looking for the other dog all the time. I would say her name and she looked surprised as if she had forgotten I was there.

It is just so so sad.

I must admit I am a bit puzzled by this situation - From what I understand this lady took the dog to the vet on her own last night (or did she actually go - maybe she is telling you she did). Did you speak directly with the vet who is treating the dog (or the reception) and did the vet actually tell you that the dog would be better in a couple of days or did the owner tell you that was what the vet had said to her. It may be that this lady is so upset that she cannot face reality. avoiding the whole situaiton.
I still think you should both go with the dog together, but you do have to get the lady to agree to this help. It is a very difficult problem, but if this lady is so resistant, short of asking the RSPCA to call, I am not sure what else you can do except keep going in to try and make sure the dog is as comfortable as possible.
By the way is the dog still managing to go outside to relieve itself - it maybe that once it can no longer get outside to toilet the lady will have to re-think.
So sorry, it is not a lot of help suggesting things from a distance when we cannot see the whole picture.

Yes the lady took her her dog to the vet on her own last night. She commutes so her daughter came and sat with the dog after I called her and made an appt for when she got back.

I spoke to the receptionist and she got a vet to phone me back that had the notes in front of him. I am not a vet but I cannot agree with the latest diagnosis of vestibular disease which supposedly presents like a doggy stroke. She does not look like a dizzy drunken dog to me. I have watched her deteriorate and her back legs are very weak and also she has not eaten more than an occasional mouthful for really a week or two. So the fact that she does not have the strength to pull herself up and balance on her legs is what is happening plus the fact she is painfully thin. The vet disclosed to me he had seen her the night before and when I tentatively suggested maybe the owner was struggling with the option of euthanasia he snapped at it was not for him or me to say.

The dog has been incontinent for a long time so I regularly clean up the dog and the floor so that is not making the decision clearer to her.

I am hoping to hear some better news later. But I struggled with leaving the dog and the bottom line is it is her dog and her decision as to whether to let her dog carry on like this or not. I think it is cruel but obviously she does not.

I really do have sympathy for your situation Maisiesmum and I have run out of suggestions. The option is always there for you to contact the RSPCA.

My dogwalker has permission to take Toby to the vet if anything were to happen. Do you have something similar? Could you take it to a different vet for an emergency?

Yes I also have permission to take to the vet in an emergency. The problem lies with the fact that the owner is well aware of how her dog is and I know what my vet would say if I were to take her there. He would look at her and recommend euthanasia I feel sure but again it is not up to him or me.

It is really difficult to not overstep the line. It seems as though her vet is giving her hope which she is hanging onto. Even if the latest symptoms are vestibular disease which the dog can recover from she was in a terrible state before she actually became pretty immobile. So she recovers from that to what? She is a 16 year old dog with existing health issues and a mass which I presume is cancer was found recently. It only goes downhill from here and its terrible knowing that and watching her suffer.

Every time I contact the owner at work she leaves early and every time I have let her know about any health concerns from diahorrea to limps she has taken the dog to the vet for treatment. I know she always has as she leaves the notes for me to read and the latest box of tablets.