Please help me sleep!

I am one of those people who can sleep through anything, except for things that seem pre-programmed into my brain: the sounds of the rabbits escaping , my boyfriend getting in or out of bed or talking in his sleep, or the sound of someone at the front door.

When we brought Amber home, we were both quite happy for her to sleep in the bedroom with us. She was a very good bed-mate and would curl up on my feet and not move all night. She never even woke up needing to toilet. When my mum's dog, Sam, moved in, we had to move the dogs downstairs. Sam was not a good bed-mate and would spread himself over the largest possible area, wrap himself in the blankets and spend the whole night sighing in your ear. We tried initially to enforce dog beds on the floor, but as soon as we fell asleep, Sam would get back on the bed (my mum always let him sleep on hers). So we started insisting that they slept downstairs. We never had any problems after that.

When Sam went home, Amber started to cry at night. It never bothered me or woke me up, and I could happily sleep through. My boyfriend, however, was repeatedly woken up and his restlessness would wake me up. Several times he would actually go to the top of the stairs and call down for her to be quiet, which worked for about half an hour and then she'd start again as soon as he fell asleep. He couldn't remember ever getting out of bed or calling, only that he'd had a really bad night's sleep, and for a while he tried wearing earplugs but couldn't sleep with them (although everything was blessedly silent!). We tried giving Amber teddies to sleep with, left lights on, turned lights off, had a radio on quietly, had a firm bed-time routine, and even gave her an old t-shirt that smelt like me for company, but she would cry from as soon as the door closed until my boyfriend had had enough and got up in the morning.

I decided that I couldn't cope with him being grouchy in the mornings anymore and keeping me awake all night with his tossing and turning that I suggested that if he couldn't ignore her when she cried, we might have to let her come back upstairs. It seemed natural that she would have a period of adjustment since she wasn't used to being alone at night, but she just wasn't adjusting because calling to her was giving her a response. So about two weeks ago, she came back upstairs.

The first few nights were fine. She slept on my feet, and once asleep didn't seem to move. We all finally started to get a good night's sleep. However, after a couple of nights, it changed. She would sleep nicely for a few hours, and after a bit, would decide that in between my boyfriend and I would be warmer and more comfortable than the end of the bed. Her movement would wake up my boyfriend who would then get frustrated that her weight was dragging the blankets away. So he would send her back to the end of the bed, and that would wake ME up! This would go on for the rest of the night. In the morning, my boyfriend can't remember much of it, just that the dog "kept him awake" and his sleep was broken.

Last night, she started on my feet, but within fifteen minutes was squishing herself between us, so we fetched a blanket and had her sleep on the floor. At about 3:00am, she started getting up, turning round and around, scratching at the blanket and then settling down with a big sigh, then a few minutes later doing it again. My boyfriend woke me up about half an hour later asking "What is she doing??" (but in less pleasant tones ). Several times, he crossly told her to stop it and go to sleep and she would settle down for ten minutes or so, and start again.

It's driving me crazy. I can't understand why my boyfriend can't just ignore her and sleep! It's him making a fuss about the dog that's waking me up, and while he can happily nap during the day, I'm the one that has to get up and go to work. I suggested that Amber and I sleep on the bed and he sleep in the spare room, but that went down like a lead balloon

I feel like we're just confusing Amber even more with all this upstairs, downstairs, on the bed, off the bed so I'm not surprised she's having difficulty settling. Would a DAP plug-in make any difference?

Dap diffusers do help but they didn't help shila they made her worse
We had a lot of what u said ur going through with Shila, All we did was decide on where she was going to sleep and never move her from that spot so she is on the landing, she does get on the bed but as sad as it sounds i used to go to bed during the day and train her so by the evening time it was still fresh in her mind plus u can give her treats for staying on her bed when u are training her but I dont think many people would take dog treats to bed with them
She is fine now and happily sleeps on her bed on the landing u do need to be consistant though u cant keep changing where u want her to sleep.
Hope some of this helps x

Dingo was like this so we put his crate in our room and he slept in there. It meant he couldn't jump on the bed but he had the comfort of us being near him. We've gradually moved his crate further away and he's now happy to sleep in it in his room downstairs. Ok his whole crate didn't stay in the same place but his bed in the crate did so it didn't faze him too much to move a bit further away from us.

Heidi

it sounds like she might not now what she should be doing as you said she was upstairs then downs and now upstairs, what about a crate that can be hers only nice bedding etc you can put her in it and it might feel mre comfy for her. SHe can still be in your room and be with you . I say this as sophie my lab did this all night we tried every thing, but the only thing she was happy with was her crate that we had down stairs so we now have 1 upstairs and we dont hear any thing from her its her safe heaven. just a thought hun hope you get some sleep soon. xx

sorry fliggle posted same time...lol

You say the problem began when her friend went away, so I assume she`s lonely. Most dogs don`t like being alone. Maybe try a crate in your room? And get the boyfriend some earplugs till she settles?