In A Right State

I honestly don't know if I can go back to work, I don't even feel safe leaving the house at the moment.
I really thought I was getting it together since being involved in the armed robbery at work in January, but Wednesday afternoon two lads about 20 in hoodies who I recognised to be friends of the one who done the armed raid came into the garage shop and just kept hanging around in an intimidating manner. I thought it was just me feeling that because I must still feel a bit vulnerable so was over reacting, so I kept quiet although was shaking a bit. They finally left as we were really busy for the 15 mins they were there.
Anyway this morning they came back and I said to the girl I am working with to watch them carefully, agin they just hung around and kept watching us and I got really nervous and shook, but luckily we were really busy again and after about 10-15 mins one said to the other theres too many cars and people we'll come back later. They then left and girl I was working with callled Security over and they looked at the video tapes and recognised them immeadiatly as two lads who was banned from Tesco for shop lifting and getting violent.
4 hours later one came back and other girl ran straight out the back leaving me alone with him and one other customer and called security. I was petrified and tried to keep the customer I was serving delayed by fumbling around so I wouldn't be left alone with this moron. Anyway security came and took him out the back and I just went to pieces. I was shaking from head to toe and couldn't get my breath properly. in the end one of the managers called the store and got someone to relieve me took me over the store and got the personal officer to get me a cup of tea, which she did and then 2 mins later went off not to return.
So once the shaking subsided a bit as there was only 20 mins left of my shift I walked back over the garage to see how I felt in there and it wasn't good,
Came home my brain all over the place and took the dogs for a walk, but coming down a road I saw two lads in Hoodys, not the same two but it terrified me and I had to rush home shaking like mad.
I just feel scared to go out as I live within 3 mins walk of these people and the armed raider and I just don't want them to recognise me.
I am seriously thinking of just jacking work in, I've tried working through it all but it obviously hasn't helped. I just feel I need a few weeks to get my head straight and face getting outside my house again, before even contemplating whether I can go back to work again, but if I take time off each day counts as a percentage and it would make my percentage so high I would get a written warning.
I don't know which way to turn right now. Wish I had a partner to support me.

Aww Bev I wish i lived closer so i could give you a big {{{hug}}} right now X

Go to your doctor and tell them how your feeling and what's been happening, your doctor will probably sign you off for a few weeks then you won't get a written warning You shouldn't be going to work in that state right now.

I'm always around if you want to chat, i know it's not the same.....I feel for you hun, i really do X

I agree, take as much time off as you need. I'm surprised your employers don't seem to be helping you very much. I can imagine what you are going through because when I had a shop in Westcliff it was constantly vandalised by a gang of kids and the police did nothing, they smashed window after window, threatened me and my dogs and in the end I decided that the business wasn't worth what it was doing to my health so I moved down to Cornwall!
Have you had your counselling session yet?
Becky

Work agreed to let me have 5 sessions of councilling which started finally this Wednesday just gone. My next session is next Thur, but thats not going to help with me getting on with a normal life and going into work Monday.
I hate taking time off and rarely do as I feel so guilty to let everyone down but for the first time ever I really cannot face being put in that position again and am scared witless about it. Just sitting here thinking about it is making my heart beat fast with fear.

Oh Bev how awful for you, I really feel for you. DONT LET THE BU**ERS GET YOU DOWN, I know its easy to say that

Can the doctor give you a sick note so you can have a bit of time off to gather yourself.

If i were your employer i'd fully understand your reluctance to be in the situation again.

Can they not move you to another department for a short while so at least you can at least be out of the house but not in the position where you clearly feel vulnerable.

Big Hugs from spain chin up girl xx

Well if you want to get away from it all just for a few days you are more than welcome to come down to soggy Somerset and stay with me for a few days, dogs welcome!
Becky

id go to the doctors as well, get a sick note, have a break from work. go away for a few days, ok it wont solve the problem but it will make u stronger to face the problem. cant u get tescos to find out from the police why they havnt arrested that moron???and ask if they can move u to inside the shop. u cant let these idiotsa dictact your life, it means they have won, u have to show them whos boss, and its not them.
(((((hugs to you)))))

go to the doctors on monday phone in sick, tell them it is due to what has happened and see the councillor on thursday.
they will say you need more than 5 sessions for a start, i can nort see how they can give you a written warning if it is related to the 1st time, you could take them to a tribuneral for unfair dismissmal.
fear and stress in not handled right will result in more time off if left.
by right they should realise you need to be found a job within the stall not at the pumps.
so your not faced with it!