This must be an achievement.

Being rejected by 2 mothers in 52 years.

Gill today bless her tried to get mum to smooth things over with me. Mum left a message on my answering machine asking if we could talk she couldn't sleep or eat she ate her dinner yesterday because she told Gill how nice the pork was I left for her Tuesday.

Well within minutes I was the spiteful one I have said nasty things to her. I tried to remain calm and say yes I did raise my voice sometimes to defend myself and other times to try to get through to her not to do the very silly things she does most of the time.

Then she started going on about me being adopted how my biological mother took the money meant for my pushchair how she didn't have to have 5 children and could of given me back any time but she plodded on and kept me. I pointed out I had heard the money story too many times. I tried to explain how hurt I was about her allegation of me screaming at her when she was ill in bed it wasn't even that time about the shopping it was another time she had been ill and I didn't shout and scream at her anyway.

Next I get how she has always loved me but I can't say anything for the other children though.. Oh yes I know Gill loves you so that means my brothers. Then we got onto the hospital and why I wasn't taking her anymore she then said only Paul looks after me properly he does my housework. I said so what about all those meals I cook you oh yes I know that was her reply. Then up came the adoption again and she said I know you don't want to come and see me anyomore I said f course I do but I need some time to get over what you accused me of I was very hurt.

One more time about the adoption so I said you have such a low opinion of me mum and she replied well I know you won't be coming again so I will shut the phone off now.

Gill says she wished she hadn't bothered and is now really upset over it. I told her not to worry I am staying away for long while and see how things go.

Not sure how this will end up.

Ah well, let Paul do her housework and all the running around for her.

Don't understand why she needs to keep telling you you're adopted....You already know that.

Thinking of you *Hugs*

I seriously think she has something wrong with her brain no rational thinking person would act like that surely.

I have known I was adopted since I was 5.

Oh I am so sorry you are going through this.Who knows where it will end, but I wish you strength through it all as it isn't easy.Take care.

Oh Lynn...... she really is being very silly indeed, and you're the one suffering as a result....

I feel for you honey, I really do, as I had a crap relationship with my mother too, and it really is the worst feeling ever....

x0x

Big hugs Lynn. I know how awful and insecure Charly has felt growing up knowing her mother never contacted her once in her life and her father has not been there for her either. It is awful, so for that I can have a little insight into how you must feel.
I hope things can be mended one day but if not she will be the one losing out, you have Gordon and your lovely boys to give you a bright future ahead.

oh, Lynn, can you not find a Counsellor or mediator? This emotional blackmail is so abusive. It must be really dragging you down.
I feel for you and wish I could help. Gentle hugs to you.
x

Thanks all its such a shame. We have over the years had a good relationship bit rocky here and there but thats what happens itsn't it ? But you move on but this time she is adamant that I am to blame and I am not backing down this time I have taken so much cr*p recently and all I have done has no bearing it seems so maybe I need to stay away now and she may realise and she may not.

If she doesn't there is not much I can do about it and maybe I won't see her again till she is at the end of her lfe who knows.

What I do know is I feel cr*p and rejected and hurt she thinks so little of me I am consoling myself with the fact she is angry we are living our lives she can't and that she must be very ill thats how I will get through it.

Thanks so much for the support and I will try to enjoy my weekend away.

Thank you Claire I was thinking about it yesterday I may look into it when I get back from my weekend away.

I agree with C&D about a counsellor. TBH as an outsider reading what you put I think that both of you have issues that could do with being resolved.

I wish you both luck and hope things can be addressed before anything happens to her, even these type relationships (rocky up and down ones) can leave one feeling guilty all their lives