Mine are aimed mainly at strange dogs, rather than people who they tend to ignore:

Kiri - if you so much as look at me or my mum, I'll have you - not very fast now I'll admit cos i'm getting on a bit! If you are a person without a dog I'll lean on you for a cuddle cos I'm very nice really!

Milo - if you are a lurcher, please play with me. If you're not, I would just like to exchange sniffs and move on.

Rowan - are you a child? - I love children! If not, please say hello to me anyway but I might bark with excitement and I will probably spin.......why do all the children hide from me?

Guy - I'm not here, please don't acknowledge my existence. Oh no, I'll have to pretend to be brave and I'm not, really I'm not.

Gem - okay get on with it, yes I'm a pretty little girlie but I'm not really interested in you, sorry.

Honey - 'I'm a Greyhound cross, not a Greyhound, and thats not a bad thing! And even though I've got the mind of a sighthound, I have the nose of a scenthound, if you have treats on you I will know!!!'

Diesel - 'the world is my treadmill! And if you talk to me you might never get to leave me! Oh and I like talking face to face if I can too '

asbos would read "i know i have no hair, i dont need teling YET again, no i am NOT ugly, or ill, or cold... YES i am a DOG, i like to run play eat and sleep like all the ones with fur... id quite like a cuddle if you wouldnt mind, and i will jump at your leg until you give me a stroke, to make up for all the horrible things you have said... other dogs, i will bark at you, i wont bite, i just dont want to be eaten"

daphnis would read "no im not a lady, despite what you think, if i get too close you may realise i smell of some form of poo, but go on then, i spose you can give me a fuss..i will lick, i like licking... mum hates licking...."

Max: Please don't look at me, or talk to me. I hate strangers and I will bark and growl and snap to make myself look scary so you leave.

Murphy: I LURVE you... and you there, and you, and you over there! Please mind my tail, I'm practising to be a helicopter!

Culotte...... Do you have to stroke me, yes I know Im wonderful

Bo..... Throw the ball, chuck the ball, throw the ball

Ziggy..... Hi man

Bryony........ Am I the prettyest and niceist dog you have ever met am I? am I?

Pebbel........ Yes I know I have huge ears THANK YOU

Sweebertja................ Me, the goodest dog in the world,

Isabel........... Yes my ears are bigger than Pebbles, but I fit mine

Ahhhhhhh.....sweet Love this one.

LOL LOL - both so cute

Just the one word.....

DON'T

Cava
Well hello ladies yes I am gorgeous I'm a big bad handsome man

Zymi
Yes I do like my ears scratched but I'd rather you flung my ball