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annoellyn is offline  
Location: Canada
Joined: Nov 2017
Posts: 11
09-02-2019, 06:28 PM

Dog doesn't like roommate

I've lived with my roommate for 13 years and had my dog for 2 years. Even after two years my dog still doesn't like my roommate. It doesn't bother him but it bothers me that he is always complaining about my dog.
My roommate doesn't like dogs.
I was super excited he let me get a dog. However two incidents happened that lead to my dog not trusting him and now we can't seem to make any headway even after years have passed.
My dog pooped on the floor in front on my roommate and he swatted her on the butt, not hard. My dog cowered and whined, sunk low to the ground. He felt really bad and immediately called me to tell me what happened. Later that night my dog peed, all over his bed. Then a few days later my dog got out while I was at work and my roommate had to go get her. She completely takes out and tried to bite him, screaming, people were staring and he was just trying to get her home again. I was on the phone with him at the time and told him to just let her go and I'll leave work and find her. But he got her home.
That was two years ago. Now my roommate is getting annoyed at my dog. If he hugs me, my dog barks. If he shakes me awake, my dog barks. If I'm not home, she just sits by the door or in her kennel and doesn't move. We've tried treats with him when I'm not home. She'll takes them but goes back to door or kennel. My roommate is annoyed that he has to really what he does around me. It's not aggressive barking just barking.
He can pet her and give her treats but it doesn't seem to amount to anything.
Now my roommate just says they don't like each other but I'm wondering what else we can try? I don't care if they ever are friends but at least my dog should feel comfortable.
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Chris is offline  
Location: Lincolnshire
Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 7,888
11-02-2019, 03:32 PM
Play is your room mates friend. If he can get your dog to play, he's halfway there. Also him being very light and jolly with her.

I'm guessing that there may be more that goes on that you don't know about between your dog and housemate. It may be that your housemates tells her off or talks harshly to her at times. After the 'smacking' incident, any raised voice will worry her
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Miriam John
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Miriam John is offline  
Location: Vermont, USA
Joined: Mar 2017
Posts: 13
14-02-2019, 07:09 PM
Aww, this sounds tricky. Sorry to hear about this situation. It sounds like there's a lack of communication and/or misunderstanding between your roommate and your dog, and also between you and your dog.

Starting with you and the dog: It sounds like your dog doesn't feel that the roommate can be trusted with you (hence the barking). Do you feel this way? Do you have issues with the roommate? If so, dogs are amazing at picking up energies and emotions from humans, and I'm sure the dog could sense anything that's going on, even if it's subtle. If you don't have issues yourself with the roommate, then it's probably a miscommunication between you and your dog, where the dog thinks you are uncomfortable around the roommate and you haven't learned how to tell the dog otherwise.

And roommate and the dog: obviously they have an anxious rivalry going on. The roommate doesn't like dogs, the dog knows that and doesn't feel respected/loved/welcomed by the roommate. It sounds like they're anxious around each other and haven't taking the time or focus to break through communication barriers and get to know and trust each other.

So, what can you do? Start with observation. Just use all your senses, watch and listen and observe all the details of your dog's interactions with the roommate, the dogs body language, the roommates body language, tone of voice. Dogs are sensitive to energy, and the best a human can do for their dog is to begin learning how to sense the energy in an environment, to see things that way the dog does, and come to a common understanding. Once this happens, you'll know exactly what's needed in order to repair the dogs relationship with the roommate, and I'm guessing your relationship with the dog will end up a lot deeper and more connected too. It's all about your individual situation, your own pack dynamic. So I can't offer you any specific advise without knowing what the dynamic is, but I can remind you to take time to examine this dynamic for yourself, to get to know yourself and your relationships more honestly and thoroughly. This is what dogs can teach us, if we are open to their lessons.
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