Do you think you can be in love with a friend?

thought i would write this on here, having a bit of a think out loud thread...

as the title says can you be in love with a friend?

i shall explain the situation...

there is a man (i say man, i still think of him as a boy, but forget we have both grown up!!) ive known him since i was born, my mum used to baby sit him. hes now 23.. we grew up together as kids, were really good friends.. i moved away for a bit, and when i moved back i was at the age where boys were interesting, and good looking, not just friends (i was 16) when i moved back i fancied the pants off him and he liked me.. i ended up with someone else, but when we went on a break i slept with said boy (this would make me 17.) got back with boyfriend, didnt think anything of it..

over the years though, we have had a few kisses (latest being just sunday) and we are close.. but i cant decide if we are too matey for anything to ever become of it.

we are just comfortable together.. when we are in our local pub we think nothing of sitting on each others knee if there isnt enough seats at the bar, we can wind each other up and laugh at each other, play fight, talk to each other about anything.

people constantly tell us we would be a good couple, and have beautiful children (no thanks! im only 21!) but sometimes i cant help but think we are too matey... yet we always end up together, i just dont know i dont get butterflies when i see him (used to years ago! but i do get jealous if i have to see him with another girl)

he text me the other night when i left his mums, saying that he would grow up for me (i said we wouldnt work because hes too immature) and that we would be good together, and he needed someone like me who had my head screwed on. which makes me think hmm... i dont know what to think.

if you have got this far, then i applaud you, and dont feel you have to reply, like i said im just thinking aloud.. im one confuzzled bunny at the minute

It kind of sounds like you're more than just friends already?.. I have a close guy friend that I would categorically never want to get with!

it only ever happens when we have had a drink... thats the thing.. but i guess there is always something there. his mum wants us to go out she loves me always calls me a star and tells me im beautiful, shes definitely one to make you feel good!

Sounds kind of like even though you both have tried to deny it there is something there. You only do things you don't have the guts to do sober when you drink

Aww his mum sounds nice! I guess you never know unless you try... Have things ended with the OH then?

I agree it sounds like you're already more than friends! My OH and I were friends before getting together, but not for half as long as you and your "friend" lol! Ask yourself, do you trust him? Can you imagine spending the rest of your life with him? And how would you both handle it if doesn't work out?

I've had a friend of mine who has been in exactly the same situation your in now, even down to growing up together from babies. her train of thought was that although it may well be fab to get with him, if things went sour, could they go back to being like they used to be (as in the best of mates etc etc)?

If both of you feel the same, then it will only be a matter of time before you both succumb to it enjoy the good times with him and don't force it, just suggest a few more trips out together etc etc, but dont label them dates as such and see what happens

sounds so true..

the OH was only a potential OH... we still talk, but it seems the more i learn the more he seems to be sounding like a womanizer...

i do trust him, despite seeing him with his girlfriends over the years, which honestly he hasnt always treated the best, i know he would never ever dare to treat me like that dont know about the rest of my life cant look to next week, that thought scares me haha! but i cant ever imagine not having him in my life if that makes sense?

ooh im getting excited just thinking about it sounds good just going out and not putting the pressure on, i think that because we get on as mates the pressure isnt there anyway to make ourselves have a good time, no need for small talk, we just get on

Oo you don't want to date a player!

I guess just see where things lead.. If you have a really strong friendship even if things don't work out romantically hopefully you can go back to being friends.