Cat that went to heaven

CAT THAT WENT TO HEAVEN





A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said,
'You have been a good cat all these years.
Anything you want is yours for the asking.'

The cat thought for a minute and then said 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.'

God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow.

A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat.
The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again.'
God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful little roller skates.

About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow.. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything okay?
How have you been doing? Are you happy?'

The cat replied, 'Oh, it is wonderful. I have never been so happy in my life. The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!'

hahaha...poor mice lol

That is a very good one, Barry.

Brilliant

Nice one Barry.

One day, Jill's husband came home from the office and found her sobbing convulsively. "I feel terrible," she told him. "I was pressing your suit and I burned a big hole in the seat of your trousers."


"Forget it," consoled her husband. "Remember that I bought an extra pair of pants for that suit."



"Yes, and it's lucky for you that you did," said Jill, drying her eyes. "I used them to patch the hole."

A blonde decided to redecorate her bedroom. She wasn't sure how many rolls of wallpaper she would need, but she knew that her blonde friend from next door had recently done the same job and the two rooms were identical in size.



"Buffy," she said, "How many rolls of wallpaper did you buy for your bedroom?"



"Ten," said Buffy. So the blonde bought the ten rolls of paper and did the job, but she had 2 rolls leftover.



"Buffy," she said. "I bought ten rolls of wallpaper for the bedroom, but I've got 2 leftover!"


"Yes," said Buffy. "So did I."

The executive was interviewing a young blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with any person, living or dead, who would that be?"



The blonde quickly responded, "The living one."

Oooooh nooooooo