Insensitive?

Am I being insensitive?

Had a message to say Hubby's Brother in Law had passed away, it was expected but all the same very sad.
Here's the thing, do we go to the Furneral or not, we are down South, they are up North, my Sister in Law has all her family around her & the last time we saw them was 2001.......if we went we would lituarally only be there for the Service as Hubby is away in work the next day.
Would it not be better to visit in a few weeks when Hubby's Sister is perhaps having less people around her etc???
Hubby is still working away at mo & home finally tomorrow, of course I will respect what he wants to do - just wondered what you thought?

Hmm it's a tough one - weddings and funerals - you almost always have to go! Maybe you could ring your hubby's sister and explain the situation and see what she thinks about whats best?

Imo it depends if u need to 'say goodbye' other than that explain,send flowers and visit in a couple of weeks time.

Firstly, sorry to hear your news Sweep.

Secondly, I don't think you are being insensitive, it is more a question of logistics.

I do like to go to funerals if I can (if you know what I mean ). The last one I went to was for a lady I used to work with her and her husband. I hadn't seen her for probably about the same length of time, namely about 10 years. I know that her husband was so touched that myself, my former boss and a former colleague went along. However, the funeral was only about a 15 minute drive from my place of work so I was able to go. It is more difficult when very lengthy travel is involved.

I think funerals are a funny thing, the family always seem to notice who is there and more importantly who is not there. by not going it might create a rift between your hubby and his family.

Personally I feel it's one of the last things we can do for folk we know , be them family or friends, is to attend their funeral.

Nothing worse than a funeral with no mourners, seems a shame that someone has lived a life and no on can be bothered to attend for what ever reasons they may be...(thats not directed to you sweep) just a general thought.

Having a good turn out always seemed to help said family through the service and from my experience they are extremely grateful and touched that you have turned up to pay your respects.

If it was me,I would go, or at least incourage your hubby to do so.
I understand its a long way, but you have to ask your self, (or your hubby does) will he regret not going to support his family in their hour of need.

I was unable to go to Mother's funeral due to the distance [and time factor] involved. I was also unable to go and see her during the last two weeks she was in hospital so I was never able to say goodbye to her.

But I mourned in my own way and according to my religion.

Sorry for your loss. I don't think you are - entirely up to you and your husband and, of course, practicality.

I know it's a bit different, but just on that sort of subject, I don't go to weddings when I'm invited - I HATE weddings! They bore me rigid. I've already refused two for the coming year. You'd think they'd get the hint. I don't think you HAVE to go to weddings if you're invited. And anyway, someone has to watch the dogs!

You're not alone, I don't do weddings or funerals and I have left instructions in my will stating there is to be no funeral service for me, just bung me in the oven and then bury the casket in a woodland setting.

I feel exactly the same and have said so. Not about yourself, you understand, but you know what I mean.

That made me laugh out loud