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jackiew
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Location: north wales(but from essex)
Joined: Apr 2004
Posts: 11,424
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10-03-2007, 12:57 PM
so sorry to hear what has happened hun

if you do head up to wales let me know and you can come over to mine if you like
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leo
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Location: Long Eaton
Joined: Oct 2004
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10-03-2007, 12:59 PM
then dont waste your feelings trying, i know your mixed up emotionally you will be, but it is clear things are not going to improve dont stay around for more hurt.
the fact she is showing no feelings says alot, she doesn't care how much your hurting and if she is back with her x good luck to them both, they split before and no doubt with time will happen again.
some times things in life happen when we never understand and have answers too but life moves on and we have to as well.
put yourself 1st and protect your own feelings the rest will ease with time, stay strong you know we are always around if you need us.
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Helena54
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Location: South East UK
Joined: Mar 2005
Posts: 27,437
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10-03-2007, 01:00 PM
Unfortunately nothing stays the same Lorna, everything changes, people change, that's life I'm afraid, and the older you get the tougher you'll find yourself being. We all have to learn through our experiences in life, and although it feels like a kick in the teeth at the moment, further on down the road, you'll find yourself with someone else and be so much happier than you are now, if you're lucky, that's what happens, this one just wasn't meant to be. Thank goodness it was only 7 months and not 7 years, then you'd have felt even more pain than you are now. When you go, she will have taken a little piece of your heart with her, but you've got a lot more love to give to somebody else who is right for you. I'm a great believer in fate, you will find that soulmate one day, and you'll know instantly. I just hope there's no too many heartaches for you along the way until that day comes, but believe me, most of us have been there somewhere along the line, and it's the most awful feeling in the World I know that.

Now get that confidence hat on again, and start persuing your plans ahead. That's a good idea to move to your Dad's, hopefully the doglets can go with you, he won't mind, I hope? She'll probably start pestering you again if this new affair isn't up to scratch, but hopefully you'll be tough enough to get on with your new life by then. There is somebody out there for you who will love you always and never look elsewhere, that's what I'm lucky enough to have, and you will too one day. Try not to feel too down about her, it sounds as if no amount of pleading is gonna work at the moment when she has eyes for somebody else, and like I said before, desperate is definitely not attractive, so you need to stay full of confidence and strength and let her know you've accepted it. Take care, xxxx
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maebme
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Location: Ayrshire, Scotland
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 3,217
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10-03-2007, 01:46 PM
Rejection is so difficult to bear. But, unfortunately we can't make people love us if they don't. Very often in relationships one partner loves much more than the other, gives more than the other and works harder at making the relationship work. At the moment, you are probably in shock. Part of you still does not want to accept this 'rejection'. You will remember good times and special times you have had and wonder 'Well, if it wasn't love, why did this happen?' The truth is that for some people 'love' is a transient thing - something that happens, blossoms and then fades. Consequently, like butterflies, they flit from flower to flower, enjoying the nectar and flying off when it is gone. The person left behind has to cope with the pain of rejection and unrequited love and pick up the pieces of her life. Sometimes it is hard to see the positive in the situation. You have many positives.
1. you are young enough to make a fresh start in life
2. your partner has told you fairly promptly, so you haven't suffered by living a lie for any great length of time
3. you have somewhere you can go to lick your wounds
4. you have your dogs, who love you to pieces just as you are - completely unconditionally.

Now, it may take a while to get over this - but you will recover. You may take a while before you can trust again - take your time on that score. When you find the person who can love you through thick and thin - like your dogs - then you will have found your ideal partner.
Chin up - take care - we are all rooting for you.
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Nicky1979
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Location: Norfolk, UK
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10-03-2007, 01:57 PM
I cannot add any more advice to the great advice already given.

But just wanted to send you lots of love, hugs & licks from me and the boy xxxxxxx
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Fudgeley
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Location: Warrington UK
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10-03-2007, 02:16 PM
I would still have a chat with the Citizens advice just so you know what your rights are. Be empowered!!!
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Lorna
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10-03-2007, 11:48 PM
Hi everyone,

I cannot thank you enough for taking the time to write such lovely, supportive things, those who have shared personal stories as well, I am so grateful to you all.

She went out at 7.30am and hasn't come back, I'm in bed now, she's obviously been with and is staying with her ex. I know its over, and I am starting to get cross at her cowardice. I miss the good times, but they're over now!

I will write more 2moro, thank you all so much again xxxxxxx
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Meganrose
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Location: Lake District, Cumbria.
Joined: Feb 2006
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11-03-2007, 12:00 AM
Originally Posted by sweetveronica View Post
Hi everyone,

I cannot thank you enough for taking the time to write such lovely, supportive things, those who have shared personal stories as well, I am so grateful to you all.

She went out at 7.30am and hasn't come back, I'm in bed now, she's obviously been with and is staying with her ex. I know its over, and I am starting to get cross at her cowardice. I miss the good times, but they're over now!

I will write more 2moro, thank you all so much again xxxxxxx
Hey you're welcome hun Things will improve, try and get some rest and remember we're all still here if you need us XX
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Vodka Vixen
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11-03-2007, 12:27 AM
Missed this thread, so sorry to hear this, yes been there done that too and you WILL get over it, sending big hugs to you xoxoxoxox

Keep smiling
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Lorna
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11-03-2007, 12:02 PM
Thanks everyone, she came home today, and my stepson is really upset. She says its because we row- but we haven't rowed for ages! I don't know, she's so wonderful in so many ways, little things, that used to make me die laughing are what I'm going to miss the most. I'm feeling very lonely. Apparently she's coming home tonight and having dinner with me and my stepson. I want her to say its all ok and that I can stay with her, but she won't, I know that. I love her still and my heart is still breaking! I know you all must be getting so bored of me now! I just have no idea how to get over someone who you love more than anythin in the world. I know I'm young, but I love her, I don't know how I'll get over this.
xx
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