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Sarah27
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04-03-2009, 12:16 PM

Freedom Project - I had to admit defeat.

I'm really sad today. Z is going to another foster carer tomorrow. She had a big fight with my friend's springer over a plastic bottle(!) and then 5 minutes later turned on Bryan for no reason. There were no injuries thank god, but Bryan was really whimpering. I've never seen him like that before. I've checked Z over really carefully too, just to make sure that she has no injuries that the other dogs have caught - but she isn't showing any signs of pain.

So I've decided that it's for the best that she goes to another foster carer. My first priority is Bryan and I think that there personalities just clash. 99% of the time she is fine with him, but there is that 1% which is really unpredictable and seems to be over nothing most of the time. I feel like I won't be able to leave them alone together just in case something happens.

So she's going to a carer whose current foster dog is going back to it's owner today. This lady doesn't have any dogs in the house so maybe it'll be more suitable. Z has never lived with a dog before so we were taking a bit of a gamble.

It got me thinking though, that we are taking a risk with fostering. I think sometimes the owners aren't totally honest about their dogs so I don't trust what I am told about them to start off with. Z's owner siad she had never shown aggression to any other dog, but she's shown it a few times now. I still think she's a lovely dog and I'm not blaming her - it just hasn't worked out this time.

I'm lucky that I'm in a situation where she can go to another place - if she were my own dog I would have more inclination to work on the problem I guess (does that sound harsh?).

I've decided to have a little rest from staffies for a bit and ask that our next foster dog be either the same size or smaller than Bryan. I think that'll give me more confidence. They've just had two Bedlington terriers come onto the project, that sort of dog would be great! I've not been put off staffies - I still love them, but I'm just trying to be fair to Bryan.

So, I'm feeling upset, sad, like I've let the Freedom Project and Z down, but I'm hoping that this experience will make me a stronger person and more able to cope in the future.
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MissE
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04-03-2009, 12:27 PM
oh honey, you haven't let anyone down, not the project and not Z *hugs*
You have found out some traits that will enable Z to go into a home which is specifically suited for her. This is the good side of fostering - because as you do know, some owners do lie about their dogs and the reason for surrender.
My own dog is best as an only, and no failure in you finding that out now, rather than once Z was rehomed. Who knows what could have happened to her then. You have enabled her to move on and get a home suited to her.

Don't feel sad, you are doing a sterling job. x
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magpye
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04-03-2009, 12:28 PM
It broke my heart that I wasn't able to help Santa the rescue Husky, so I empathise with how you feel. I cried and cried that night over it and am still haunted by his beautiful face. But he and Pharaoh just wouldn't get along and he was just too silly and boisterous and high energy for my otherwise low energy stable pack..

I would still like to foster one day and in the mean time I am trying to help in different ways. I did my first homecheck at the weekend. Hopefully I can help find proper homes for the dogs I don't have room for.

Some times these things don't work out...

(((hugs)))
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Sarah27
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04-03-2009, 12:29 PM
Thanks hun, I know I'm doing what's best for everyone. I think to try to struggle on when I can't would be worse because one of the dogs will get hurt. They've been fine since this morning and are actually playing together now, but still there's that doubt it might happen again.

I think Z's high energy is partly the problem - she's 18 months old and very exuberant
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Shona
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04-03-2009, 12:33 PM
I wouldnt loose heart hun, it would be diff if you didnt have Bryan, poss give it one more try, remember how much you gave the last one, xx
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CheekyChihuahua
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04-03-2009, 12:47 PM
You are doing a fantastic job with the fosters. There's bound to be some that you just can't help, because of your circumstances, i.e. having Bryan.

Don't get downhearted. Remember the positive outcomes, they'll keep you going x
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Brundog
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04-03-2009, 12:52 PM
hi sarah

i think you are doing the best thing, your top priority has to be bryan.. i would suggest though making sure he has a good experience now with another staffy ( tilly) just to make sure he has no hard feelings LOL

it could well be that the owner wasnt 100% honest or in all honesty it could be her age at 18 months they are still trying it on, but regardless you have to put your own dog first.

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Krusewalker
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04-03-2009, 12:54 PM
hi there

what is the freedom project?
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Ben Mcfuzzylugs
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04-03-2009, 03:37 PM
hun, dont worry you cant help them all but you are doing lots of good to the ones you can help

of course bryan is the most important just now

totaly know what you were going tru, there have been times if there was somewhere to give mia back to i would have

i have learnt from my mistakes and if i had a new dog in the house again it would be crated and not even let loose with my dogs for a couple of days, then no toys or chews for a while

you have totaly done the right thing, you are just a short term home before they hopefully return home, not your job to fix behavioural problems
i am sure your next one will be better for both you and bryan
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Ramble
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04-03-2009, 03:43 PM
You certainly have not let anyone down. You have tried your best and it hasn't worked. You have to put you and your dogs first. Huge hugs.
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