Thought I'd add this one ..... Tibetan Spaniel:

Prospective owners are required to undergo a series of rigorous tests before being accepted as suitable owners of this unique and rare breed ....

Must be fluent in the Tibbie language and have an indepth understanding of the workings of the Tibbie mind - a degree is preferred

Have advanced negotiating skills. Preference will be given to members of the diplomatic service or MI6.

Undergo a means test to determine whether HRH will enjoy the luxury to which he/she considers his/her right by birth..... a live in chef, fulltime personal assistant and resident yak are essential as are plush sofas and cushions.

If necessary prospective owners will be required to trade in their car for a Popemobile in order for sir/madam to be seen in all their splendour whilst travelling.

Should all these pre-requisites be met you will then be asked to sign a contract to love and obey this tiny tyrant and to accept without question that he/she always knows best and his/her decision on whatever subject is FINAL!

Have no fear. It clearly states the X is as in X Men. Your dobermann is both pedigree and speshul, which makes it ultra rare.

I was told that by two breederss, at Crufts