Comparison to childrens advice

As adults we often give advice to our children and that of others which in full of hypocricy, we tell them "Dont swear, Dont Drink alcohol, dont meet anyone from the internet "
yet, having read some posts on this and a variety of other sites we see that as adults eventhough behind a login name we dont know who the poster is we will take holidays closer to someone that attarcts us, we will visit them and then rightly or wrongly class that person as a true friend....

isnt it all a bit sad that this is how many adults in the UK are meeting people , possibly for a one off meeting, those we 'put ourselves upon ' feel obliged for whateevr reason to be polite even if they dont like us, and those wanting to meet people are just a little sadder for not as adults having a close circle of family or friends who really do know you and you them.

Opinions please

I personally don't think it's sad, I think it's just a sign of the times. People are a lot busier these days and also a lot of the simple things in life cost money. People can't always afford to go out and do things that would allow them to meet new people so they therefore have to use whatever alternative is available which is usually the Internet.

It's also not like anyone forces them to meet up with others that they chat to on the net, they do so out of free will. Who cares how you meet new people/make news friends.

I agree that we shouldn't encourage children to meet up with just anyone as children don't always think of the what-ifs but I think most adults are capable of making a sound decision about meeting someone they met online.

Also at least if you meet someone off a board like this one or any other topic that interests you then you know you've got at least one thing in common.

Well, I must be very sad, as i've never had a circle of friends (didn't get on with anyone from school/college really).
I've got on with a lot of people online, and made some wonderful friends - yes, i've met them. I've met a number of people from this forum, who I class as friends, and who have always been there if I need them.
I also met my fiance online.

Whats the difference between going to a club and meeting people there, or meeting people online with the same interests and meeting up with them?

I think chatting to others on line is fine as long as you have some sort of outside life as well socially, but i admit can get a bit addictive !

For people who can't get out due to disabilities etc i think its a good thing but i think people still need face to face contact with others otherwise you'd become a hermit !

No I don't agree at all.. your here! ...as we all our so what's the problem? I have met some really good friends within Dogsey and other sites and I do class them as friends have met a few and will meet them again! I have a close family, and have friends that I have had for years so I don't class myself as sad at all.

Elaine

Hi Billy I am not sure if you are a parent but most parents know advice given to children is seldom heeded, they go ahead and do what they want to anyway (older ones that is, and lets face it most of us have tried things our parents told us to avoid ,it is all part of growing up) .

I am not sure I understand the bit about holidays

As for the 'meeting people' well there are many ways to do this including on the internet and which ever way you choose unless you have been acquainted with someone for a long time they can never really know them or they you. Even those people you think you know intimately can spring surprises (as many find when they discover their partners are being unfaithful ).

I know a number of people who have met partners and subsequently married them after meeting on the internet, I don't class this as being any better or worse than meeting people anywhere else.

There are some members of my family to whom I am obliged to be polite but can't stand so it is not exclusive to people one meets on the Internet.

I don't find anything 'sad' about making friends on the Internet, I have made some wonderful friends .
Having 'internet friends' doesn't mean you can't have a close circle of family and friends too. At least on the Internet when you have had enough of them you can switch them off .

I dont see any hypocricy, I tell my children dont swear, dont drink, dont meet anyone from the internet. I also tell them not to drive a car, use the cooker and not to take the dogs out - all of which I do myself everyday. Once they are older they will decide for themselves what is safe and what isn't.
As for forums and meeting up, it is nice to speak to like-minded people. I have RL friends but if they were being honest with me they would probably say that hearing about my dogs is not the highlight of their week
I dont see how talking to someone on a forum is any less valid or dangerous than meeting someone in the pub

I have made some good friends on here, we meet up from time to time,

I have a life outside of dogsey as well,

I dont get the holiday thing either

everthing in balance its ok

There are a lot of things that we tell kids not to do because they don't have the same level of judgement as an adult...so I don't think it is hyprocritical to tell a child not to do something and then do it yourself.

As a child, I was only ever allowed to cross the main road by the zebra crossing or the lollypop lady. As as adult I have the judgement to know when it is safe to cross the road without these safety measures.

I think the same applies to the use of the web and meeting people from it. I have met several members from Dogsey over the 2 or so years I've been a member.

I'm by no means a perfect judge of character, especially on line where you can't see a persons face or get any other 'background' info to prove or otherwise their trustworthiness. But in meeting members for the first time I have always been cautious - only meeting those that have been on line for some time, that have been consistent in their opinions and who I have pmed regularly. Even then, the first meeting has been in public areas with other people about.

But even with 'real' friends and relationships, you are still at the mercy of the person's honesty and intregity. How many people have met their OHs in a 'real' way, only to find that they have been lied to and cheated on? Yes, it is probably easier to lie on line, but it doesn't mean that everyone on line is a fake and that eveyone in 'real life' is trustworthy.

Before the intranet, penpals were quite common - and I know of many people who travelled to meet their penpals. So why should holidaying by a webfriend be any different? Its a chance to see a different part of the country (or world) with the benefit of a local guide. It may also persuade you to open your horizons and visit places you may never have thought of visiting.

My dogsey friends are important to me because my non-dogsey friends are not interested in dogs in the same way. My dogs are a huge part of my life and I like to have friends that share that understanding.

In some ways i think it is sadder for those who never get an opportunity to turn 'virtual' friends into 'real' ones.

Sorry, can't agree.

I have met, and will continue to meet, people from Dogsey who I consider to be true friends. Why would anyone I meet outside of a forum be any truer?