I agree, she should go, she's obviously been through a lot, and not only had her own grief to deal with, but that of her children as well, she sounds a very caring mother, who puts her childrens needs first, IMO this holiday would be a great time for her to have a little 'me' time, she shouldn't feel bad about leaving the children, it's sound as if they will be very well cared for, and probably spoilt rotten , good luck to her, and hope all goes will with this new relationship

There is no such thing as 'too soon'.
As said before grief is an incredibly personal thing, and only the person grieving knows what feels right.

One of my ladies lost her husband and was told by some well-meaning friend that it is respectful to grieve for two years, no less. So she did. Made herself thoroughly miserable and missed out on a lot of things. Two years was up and she gets diagnosed with terminal cancer.

She lost two years of her life that she would now love to have back to live a little.

Life is short. Your friend has been through a lot as have her children. If it will make her happy they will get happiness in seeing their Mum get back to what she was like before.

I think the MIL is perhaps worried she may lose a bit of her grandchildren, through insecurity. No one saying anyone will ever forget her son, and indeed lots of people are happy to stay alone when they lose a partner, but not everyone does. Life is for living, and life is for THE living.

All from both myself and my sis i let her log into dogsey earlier and she found what you all had to say very kind and very lovely and these are for all of you from her
and you have to share these
Sorry its not a box each or a bunch each but she saven for her hols she said

i think deserves some happiness..............MIL sounds jeleous of then new man but she has to move on with her life

No way is she a bad person!!! It's great that she's found somebody to share her life with after all that she's been through. The MIL's attitude probably stems from her loss, and her insecurity, but your friend doesn't deserve the guilt-trip at all. Just keep on being a good friend and reassuring her that she deserves a bit of happiness as much as anybody (and probably needs it more than most!)

thanx dk the toffe chocs was nice tell your other sis (he he ) i said thanx xx

I think maybe the MiL is insecure and feels that if your sis moves on then her son will be "forgotten" and she doesnt want that. Her son wont be forgortten but maybe she just feels kind of " how can you love someone else , he was my son etc...."

Your sis deserves this holiday but i think maybe a chat with the MiL to reassure her that this new man is not going to take her sons place maybe a nice gesture....

Alex
xx