Is n`t that the thruth.

And some "the way you say it" cant be interpreted any other way , than offensive... without any misconception

Off topic posts moved HERE

I joined Dogsey to talk to like minded people and I have always received help and advice when I have asked for it and much support when I lost one of my doggies.

I do hope my posts are not seen as negative and I do read them through before I post. If I notice a particular thread is argumentative or insulting I just won't post. I avoid them like the plague!

I think new members should be encouraged and supported even if we don't agree with their actions. The best way is to help is to educate in a non judgemental way which encourages new members to come back and listen to views of members who have more experience. I hope I do that.

This situation is the same on every forum. Everyone has different opinions about things and everyone has standards that they think should be adhered to. Out of 20 randomly selected people you will never get them all to see eye to eye. Life just isn't like that. It's how you handle these situations that speaks volumes about you as a person.

Take me and Ramble for example. We have a very rocky relationship (she disagrees with my castrating Woody and the slip lead training I was doing for example and I think she comes across as a know it all and abit forceful towards people not agreeing with her point of view) but we're both mature enough to respect each others opinions and still chat as friends on PM occasionally. We even have heated discussions in threads but it's never taken personally as we taker a mature approach by respecting each others opinions.

That's not to say that I think ''certain'' people are mean on here and that it always seems to be the same ones but I've learnt after the last time I let it upset me to just let it wash over my head. I know how I want to treat others and that's all I focus on now.

I might be waffling. I've had a dreadful, upsetting day but hopefully someone will get me ;o)

Sorry to hear you've had a bad day - hope tommorrow is better for you - your post makes sense to me !

I totally agree with you. To judge harshly usually means the newcomers become alienated. Be friendly and then we can help that newcomer and in turn, help their dog/s. Makes perfect sense

I know exactly what you're saying Pidge. Good on you that you can let "stuff" wash over your head. I mean that. I'm not being sarcy. I wish I was more of an "on the fence" type of person but, that just isn't me. If someone is rude to me or another member and I think myself or another member is being unfairly judged/treated, I have to have a go back. It's my nature! I can't apologise for what I am because it's what makes me me! Some on here don't like it but, I can honestly say, this thread has done me the world of good, as I have had so many supportive pms today, that I know I can't be all bad

As for Ramble, I know what you are saying. She and I have had words before. I'm not talking about the "Rambles" of the Forum, I'm talking about the ones that are only ever mean, are never seen posting on nice subjects, like peoples' dog pics, not giving advice kindly and in a friendly way, just lecturing and trying to humiliate. We (and I think they) know who they are I hope this thread is a turning point for some members. I would like nothing more than to see everyone being friendly and kind I've heard of a few members today that have been "bullied" for one reason or another and quite honestly, it's shameful. Perhaps "some" people don't know what they are doing but I'm not one to sit by and excuse that by "they feel passionate about............." "they only care about the animals.................." - that doesn't wash with me at all

Sorry you've had a bad day Pidge. Hope you are okay now!

Totally changed my mind...sorry.

I have definitely seen the same thing happen on other forums - to me it seems to be the more 'general' forums, perhaps where there's more room for variation - ie. You won't get the same sort of polarisation on smaller forums on more specific subjects.

I don't have a 'buddy' list or an 'ignore' list, partly because I wouldn't know how to form either, but also because it surprises me when I disagree strongly with someone on one subject, then could kiss their feet on another! I'm definitely not part of any cliqueyness (and I hope it doesn't come across that way), but I can see that to new members, some things might be construed as 'cliquey' - just because many people on the forum have very similar, very strong views and don't like them questioned.

I think this is perhaps what I dislike most; the inability of some to consider differing views, especially those of 'newbies', as if they're somehow of lesser value. That's how I perceive it sometimes, anyway. Obviously, some newbies might have completely ridiculous views and could do with some things explaining, but sometimes, they just don't get the benefit of the doubt, or the chance to explain themselves, as more established members would have. I don't mean I think everyone should agree with eachother, just that sometimes it's worthwhile considering a different aspect or a different point of view. Obviously, this is all how I perceive things, it's not necessarily so.

I'm one of those daft people who takes everything to heart, and who can't sleep if I think I've offended someone, even though it's over something I'm passionate about and I've tried to be reasonable. I know not everyone is as pathetic as this and might just post what they think, without worrying about how it might affect others. In a way I envy this, but I think that sometimes, being totally self-assured can prevent further investigation - never say never.

But I do enjoy this forum - most people love a good debate, and most are very polite and civil. In fact, I don't think there's anyone that I disagree with all the time and that I'd kick off the forum if I had the power! Hugs and sloppy kisses for everyone (gosh, I'm lame!).

I try to keep out of debates, unless it's something I feel quite strongly about. Even then I don't exactly jump in there I'm like mse2ponder, I would hate to think that I've offended someone. Don't like to rock the boat I think it is a good thing to tell someone how it is, but if you get 5 or 6 people saying the exact same thing in an aggressive know-it-all manner then it's not helpful any more. I must say I've been on plenty of fora in my time, but there are arguments I've seen on dogsey that just wouldn't happen in other places.. It gets very playground-like at times!! But then, we are all passionate about what we're talking about, and there is always going to be a certain amount of 'this is what i think is right, so it must be true and all other ways are wrong' with that.
But I think it must be remembered that not everyone knows about dogs. In fact, most people know very little about them if you think about it, even dog owners. How many posts do we get about irresponsible owners, those who use outdated/inhumane techniques or those that only come out for walkies when the sun shines? I think if we used Dogsey as more of an educational tool for people who may be misguided or lacking in knowledge rather than attacking them and then saying 'but if we don't tell them everyone reading will think that this is okay!!' when pulled up about it (this isn't aimed at anyone in particular but I've seen it happen) it would be a far more productive environment AND members opinions would be taken more seriously. manners don't cost anything afterall