Lynn I am so sorry to hear this about Joel. Its the environment he's in, rubs off in the end and I just wish Social Services would do their job and remove his mother from the scene because she is the root cause of this. He's not a bad boy but a very confused one
Very dark and dismal here Car in the garage now and hope they don't find anything horrendous, gulp
Glad the party went well Nippy, Come Dine with me will be a doddle for you
Present wrapping and card writing today after girls have been out, if its deserted like yesterday will be happy. Going to check the river and see if I can get them down there and also the debris situation

Hi all thanks for the kind words.

Walked Dillon blown some cobwebs away. Mark still deciding to what to do christmas day seems he cannot win if he goes he will feel bad if he doesn't he will be in a mood.
He doesn't understand why Donna wants to send him away christmas day yes he has been bad very bad but still he is 14 and growing up and as you say not much guidance.
Mark is thinking pick him up Thursday bring him here drop him off Christmas eve at Donna's pick him up boxing day bring him here for the holiday. In the long run it solves nothing though as soon as he is back in Harlow he can pick up with the crowd he shouldn't be hanging around with.
Saying that if Mark did take him full time it would be back in Harlow but him and Lauren would have to work but it would be a stable life and if he makes Mark cross he knows it. He seems to of lost respect for his mum.
I don't suppose we will know the extent of the punishment if any he will incur till after Christmas we are hoping for a severe ticking off and us letting him know how silly he has been and letting him know how disappointed we are will have some impact.

There is no way a 14 year old boy can unravel all this. If the police are involved then maybe he can be referred to some type of help and the home life will come under scrutiny perhaps. It may be the saving of him long term

Just seem some news elsewhere June big fire at a mill in Oldham would that be near you ?

No but its near LG and also my friend who has Kofie lives in the area.

Lynn, is there anyway you could take Joel?? i know it is far from ideal but my thinking is that if Donna is wanting shot of him now he is in bother then maybe strike while the iron is hot and get the lad away. As for him not understanding why he is being sent away for christmas, personally i would tell him the truth, he has got in bother, his mum can't deal with it and he needs time away from the area so you can all deal with it and work out a plan of action, yes he is 14 and had no guidance as such but he is a smart lad i am sure who must understand that his actions have consequences and reprocussions for not only him but all who love him. I myself was bother...still am on occasion but i came good, got myself qualifications and i am sure Joel will turn out o.k too...just a crap time for it to happen really
Meeting my cousin for coffee today, we hadn't seen each other since my nans funeral and now we have run into each other twice in a week Lol, should be nice for a catchup

We hope so June Mark says so that report he sent to the NSPCC in the summer seems to of had no effect. He is hoping the welfare woman from school is going to ring him. He will be giving her a piece of his mind.

Hope it's all safe for LG and Kofie's mum June.
griff Joel knows now exactly what he has done he maybe didn't realise how serious it might become at the time but he has also learnt that to. He will know why he spends christmas day as well as the holiday here if that happens.
He was very worried about his dad being told and us and he will be mortified about Michael knowing but maybe that's a good thing.
He seems to be in with a very wrong crowd.
Can't see Donna giving him up long term he is still of value to her re: the family allowance book.

Do you know what Lynn, i think you are right, if he feels he has let his uncle Michael down maybe that will have a bigger impact on him....i was never too bothered about my mum and dad being upset with me (that sounds really bad doesn't it??) but my nan and my uncle Spud....that used to kill me. I bet Mark is so angry and frustrated, to be honest i think i would have killed someone by now, poor lad is ding all he can to try and help his son and obstacles are put in his way....maybe some good will come out of this and somebody will take responsibility for Joels case and see that his mistake doesn't get repeated, very hard when you are young and your "friends" are so important

Never easy being a parent.

We are hoping the impact of making the family disappointed will be of some help in him pulling his socks up and behaving. He does give Donna some attitude which he shouldn't.
I see it here sometimes and just give him a look or say oi young man and it stops but she screams and shouts and that gets you nowhere.
Mark will raise his voice at him then sit and talk to him to explain why he is angry. He has lost all respect for his mum it seems.
Oh well it will get sorted and hopefully he will after this set himself on the straight and narrow and ditch the bad crowd.