The 2006 Version of "I Will Survive"

I hope this isn't a bit strong for in here but I just got it in an e-mail and thought it was quite funny!

The 2006 version of I WILL SURVIVE

SING IT GIRLS!!! (maybe in your head, if you are reading this at work!)

Ready... set... go...

At first I was afraid, I was petrified.
When you said you had 10 inches, Lord I almost died!
But I'd spent so many years just waiting for a man that long,
That I grew strong,
And I knew that I could take you on...

But there you are, another lie,
I was ready for a Big Mac and you've brought me a French Fry!
I should have known that it was bull****, just a sad pathetic dream,
Should have known there was no Anaconda lurking in those jeans!

Go on now - go, walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches, then turn up with only 4!
Weren't you a brat to think I wouldn't find you out!?
Don't you know we're only joking when we say size don't count??!!

[Chorus]
I will survive! I will survive!
Cuz as long as I have batteries,
My sex life's gonna thrive!
I will always have good sex,
with a handful of latex!
I will survive! I will survive! ...Hey! Hey!

It took all my self control not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner standing tall and proud!
But to hell with your ego and to hell with all your needs,
Now I'm saving all my lovin' for a cordless multispeed!

[Chorus]
I will survive! I will survive!
Cuz as long as I have batteries,
My sex life's gonna thrive!
I will always have good sex,
With a handful of latex!
I will survive! I will survive! ...Hey! Hey!

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I want you to record yourself singing it Helen and make it available for us to hear! Hilarious words and would make a great karoke classic!

Love it Aitch - nice one!

well i am glad i didnt read it at work............. they would wonder what had happened.

Thought you lot would like that!!!

Steve, I have many talents, but according to Dave, none of them is "singing" - not even this song! My friend once dragged me up to sing "It's My Party and I'll cry if I want to" in a very packed pub one night. There I was with my mike in hand, giving it large and doing all the moves singing along with her and I wondered why everyone was laughing, butI thought it was because we were so good! When I sat down again one of our group leaned over and whispered in my ear "Helen, we were all laughing coz the DJ unplugged your mike when you started singing"! I didn't think I was THAT bad!

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I am soooo tempted to print that out and use that version at a karaoke :smt077

had a good laugh at that, it is very good, going to print it off, girls in work will appreciate that one...thanks for sharing

Brilliant one

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