the last and best of Aunty Iris - for all her fans!

Iris decided she was going to show me how to make cakes today - she decided mine just weren't cutting the mustard - and so she thought I should be shown how to bake by a REAL pro! soooo... this week - Aunty Iris shows us how to make cakes!


Firstly, you wipe the surfaces clean - this stops any germs or bacteria getting in our tummies when we eat our cakes!




You also need to wash your hand thoroughly - I'm washing my whiskers too - becasue I don't want mucky whiskers trailing through cake mix!




You mix the mixture up really well - making sure it's stirred in thoroughly.




That's it - stir until well blended and then let it stand for a moment.




Then you roll the mixture on a rolling board - use a nice clean rolling pin!




Make cake shapes and put them on a baking tray - don't be nibbling any now mind!




Then you put your tray into the oven to cook - should take about 25 minutes.




Have a cup of tea and a biscuit while you wait - that's what I like to do.




Then you can wash the dishes quickly - it helps to keep your workspace clean.




OOH! is that the time? quick - get the cakes out!




Oh they have risen well - I'm pleased as punch with those.




Now I've just got to wait for my friends to come over to enjoy my cakes wih me - mmm... yum! delicious!




Hope you all like! made me chuckle - she's such a funny little pickle at times! Wouldn't schoool have been so much better and more fun, if our home ec teachers were all like this?

xx

Aunty Iris has been pony riding today - and thought you might like to see her lesson on pony care and riding

A follow on from this thread: http://www.dogsey.com/showthread.php...highlight=iris


First you open the stable door - gently mind, so as not to startle your pony.



Take your pony out of his stable, gently leading him towards the grooming area.



Give him a kiss!!!



When you have your pony in the grooming area - check that all the equipment is in good order - you could even try the saddle on yourself!



Comb your pony's mane, make it nice and soft and shiny - especially if you are competing!



And brush his tail - making sure it's really clean and well managed.



Put pretty clips in your pony's mane to make him fancy!



And some more!



Carry the saddle over carefully, it's heavy mind! And take care not to startle your pony with it.



Saddle your pony up gently, making sure that the girth isn't too tight!



Check that the bridle is in good order and carry it to your pony.



Buckle it on to your pony and make sure again that it's neither too loose nor too tight!



Jump on and excercise your pony! Riding is such jolly fun!



Jumps are the hard part! I hope I win the gymkhana!



I did! I won! If you really practice hard like I do - you too could win a lovely rosette!



Cool your pony down gently and groom him again. Take off all his tack first of course!



Push your pony back into his stable!



Give him some hay - use the hay racks just inside the stable if you have one!



Wave goodbye!!






Oops - looks like naughty Iris forgot to bolt the stable door... so now the pony has bolted instead!


Hope you all like!

xx

Just a little story for all the Iris fans... not a lesson... but just a story!


Iris decided one day, that she really wanted her own puppy. She had seen many other ratties with their own puppies, and thought to herself “Why shouldn’t I have one?” Iris knew that the best place to look if you wanted anything at all, was the freeads! “I know!” said Iris, “I’ll try that!”




In the freeads there was an advert for a place that sold puppies, and Iris thought to herself, “I know I could get what I want from ‘Hordak’s Puppy Hoarde!’” So off she went.



Hordak had just opened his puppy shop for the morning. He’d received a telephone call from Iris and was expecting her to visit. He waited patiently for her to arrive.



Iris got there on time and said “Hello!” to Hordak. She thought he looked a mean sort of fellow, but surely, no-one who loves puppies could really be mean? Anyway – Iris was too absorbed with looking at the pretty dogs all around her! There were dogs of all breeds.


Iris looked at the adult dogs in their crates. They looked terribly miserable, especially the little poodle at the top, pawing at the glass to get out. Iris felt sad looking at them all.



Next she went to look at a couple of baskets of puppies. They were pretty, but Iris didn’t want expensive dogs… she couldn’t afford those sort of prices… but little did Iris know that the price of buying a dog from Hordak would come to far more, in heartache and upset, when the dog was older, and likely to become ill from bad breeding.



Then Iris looked at some German Shepherd puppies. The notice said they’d make ‘Excellent Guard Dogs’. “Oh no”, Iris whimpered… “I’d not be able to control one of those, and who knows what harm it might cause…? I don’t think I want a guard dog”.



Iris then looked at a basket of assorted puppies, all cross breeds. They were just the sort of thing she was after… however, when she looked at them really closely, she realised that they were all sad and ill. “I don’t want a sick puppy” Iris said, “I want a puppy that will play with me and be happy. I’m not getting a puppy from here,” Iris cried, “I’m going somewhere else”.



As she was leaving a policeman came along. He handcuffed Hordak and sent all the puppies off with an RSPCA worker. Iris watched, mystified… “What’s going on?” she asked the policeman.
“Hordak is a very bad man.” The policeman replied, “ We are taking him to jail because he’s what we call a puppy farmer. He’s broken health and safety rules, and has caused suffering to the poor animals he kept. If you want to help animals out Iris, you should go to a rescue centre instead – there are lots of poor animals taken there every day – like the ones from this puppy farm! Or you could go to a responsible breeder, where they take good care of their pets, and work on health and temperament!”

But Iris had made up her mind… she had seen some horrible things that day and wanted to help the animals in the rescue centres. “After all” she said, “I don’t want to show my puppy, so I can have a little mongrel who’ll love me and play with me – that’s what I want most of all!” Iris was still remembering the little basket of mongrel pups in Hordak’s ‘farm’ and really wanted to help puppies in a similar situation.




Iris went to her local rescue centre the very next day. Nurse She-ra was there to greet her and show her around all the animals, she even asked Iris if she wanted to help out!



Iris found some Sheepdog puppies and really liked them!



She checked them over really thoroughly and said to herself, “These puppies aren’t at all like Hordak’s – they are really friendly and healthy and don’t have fleas or anything!”.



Iris had a good look around the rescue centre – it was clean and bright and all the animals were happy as they had lots of toys to play with, and nurse She-ra was really kind to them.



Nurse She-ra told Iris that she could feed a young orphaned kitten with milk from a bottle if she wanted. Iris jumped at the chance. She loved kittens almost as much as puppies!



Then Nurse She-ra showed Iris a little puppy whose favourite toy was a pink teddy. “He’s not well at all” Nurse She-ra said. “He needs injections – would you like to help, Iris?” Would she ever?!




Iris gave the little dog his injection, he sat patiently while she did it – and then because it was a little sore and bleeding a bit after she’d finished, she gave him a plaster too.

Iris realised that animals were a lot of hard work and take a lot of looking after and a lot of spare time. Iris didn’t have a lot of time, as she was often so busy spinning on her cage bars and stashing her food. She decided that, as much as she would like one, getting a dog wasn’t the best idea after all. So instead she asked Nurse She-ra if she could volunteer one day a week at the rescue centre instead. Nurse She-ra said that of course she could!



The first assignment Iris had to do was to rescue a stray kitten from an old derelict barn. Neighbours had heard mewing and were worried so they had called Nurse She-ra to help the kitten out. They took the special mobile hospital to rescue the kitten – in case it needed emergency treatment.





They found the little kitten stuck in an old hayrack and while Nurse She-ra freed him and pulled him out, Iris inspected the rest of the barn for more kittens or this kitten’s owner. She didn’t find anything, but had a jolly nice time exploring the barn!


Nurse She-ra quickly sorted out the hospital equipment so that they could treat the little kitten as he was very sick and needed help urgently!



Iris did a scan on the kitten and made sure he got plenty of fluids. She checked his heart rate and made sure that his breathing was OK.



She made sure that the strong light was on him to warm him up – as he was very cold and damp. It did the trick and he was soon as right as rain.



Iris put the little kitten on a nice warm blanket ready to take back to the rescue centre. He was a lovely little chap – and she was sure he would find a good home really soon!



Iris went home at the end of a long, hard day and fell fast asleep… after all – not all rats spend their free time rescuing less fortunate animals!




Hope you liked it – please don’t take it seriously – we were worried that it might offend someone – but then thought it probably wouldn’t We thought it was very funny and sweet anyway! Hope you all think so too – it’s a lot different to the usual ‘aunty iris’ stuff – but thought we’d give it a go… if you all hate it – please tell me! ops:

xx

no-one likes?

xx

Just finished reading them all, very good lol! You have one patient ratty there!
Becky

One patient ratty and a patient owner too. they must have taken forever. Can`t wait to show my little girl later she will think they are hilarious. Well done and thanks for sharing.

I loved them! On an otherwise crappy day they really cheered me up, I am going to show them to OH when he gets home from work he will love them too thanks for sharing, she really was one special little girl.

LOL!!! VERY CUTE ZOUNDZ!!!!

Brilliant zoundz