Oh dear - this really seems to highlight the problem.

I am not particularly sensitive to things that are written, I think through my actions and when I have made a desicion I truely feel it is the right one....if people who do not know me or the situation choose to judge me or form a differing opinion thats fine - sometimes I feel the need to justify, and will try and do so - other times I will just give up and leave people to form thier own opinions.

However - I have a friend who takes things very persoanlly and gets incredibly upset over things that are said - she has often read things out, or been worried about telling people things for fear of how they will read the situation wrong - I have tried to explain to her that she has done has been in the best interests of all concerned but she is phobic about other peoples opinions. It really makes me aware of how upsetting things can be for some people.

That is a shame. I try not to get myself too worried, but sometimes you cant help being hurt/upset by people making judgement without knowing you... especially when they are spreading slanderous rumours over the internet that are either not true or are incorrect in some way.

I had that happen, even had some nasty, spiteful people keep typing my website address into the thread they were laying into me on and actually said they were doing that so that when people searched for my website they would come across that thread If that doesnt show the nasty, spiteful people on this forum i dont know what does

I think the problem is caused by certain people (bullies or whatever you want to call them) thinking they have a right to either judge people, or tell them what they should or shouldnt be doing and the problem really kicks off when, as often happens, their judgement is based on rumours and hearsay and then is incorrect and can be damaging and hurtful to those concerned. Certain lies were spread about me and my dogs on this forum (it was reported to the mods and some, but not all, posts were removed) and it ended up leaking out into my "real life" where i had people phoning, or coming up to me at shows asking if these nasty rumours were true. It almost made me decide not to come on here anymore... In the end i told myself i wouldnt let them win, but it is infuriating and it was SO tempting to just have it out with them publically on the forum and call them out as the uneducated, uninformed, petty bullies they are.... but i decided not to. I took it to PM, which is where i believe ALL disputes and arguments should go... Then no one is getting flamed and abused and ganged up on

I have had a copule of run ins with people but i dont take it personally. For example on one day i was having a good old heated debate with one well known member but the next day i was commenting on how great her dogs were in her piccies then she did the same back. I dont think this is two faced but knowing when to leave a subject behind.

I dont agree with bullying at all.

CC you keep commenting on new members being frightened away...perhaps its cos they cant handle the truth?
One new member had supposedly "rescued" a breeding bitch but then managed to get it pregnant again by a dog 5 times its size?? This cannot be applauded or else what are we prommoting here at Dogsey???
I, nor others were rude to this man but at the same time we didnt pussyfoot around telling him how he great he was!

I am on noones side, in no cliques.....I love dogs though and isnt that what its all about?

I have had the same thing on several occassions I try to leave hurtful comments in the threads they came from and usually will reply even to threads of people who i've had major run ins if they've posted nice pictures. I dont agree with spreading arguments from one thread into others. If i really cant bear to speak to them i just wont reply to their threads!

I am also on no ones side, and not in any cliques, in fact I don't really feel I've made any friends on here, unlike other sites I am on, I also love dogs I just wish the relentless and minute dissecting of peoples arguments if they dare to disagree with certain people would stop, it is a form of bullying and some people on here are not just putting their opinions across, they are relentlessly haranging other members, I'm not comfortable with that.

I keep commenting, Honeysmummy, because it makes me uncomfortable, to see people being made to squirm, when they have clearly made mistakes and are asking for help. The man you were talking about above, was a very kind man. He knew the situation he was in was not a good one. He was trying to do the best for his gf's dog. He knew the situation she was in was not good. He needed help and advice, as neither he nor his girlfriend had any experience with dealing with a litter of pups.

Only a few of us gave practical advice. The rest were quick to put in their "bit" - result, he went running for the hills. Nice! That's not what Dogsey is for (to my knowledge). I helped that man as far as I could via pm. I am not the most knowledgeable (by far) on here to advise on post-whelping but I did what I could. I also tried to persuade him to keep coming back, that it was only a handful of members that would judge. The rest would be happy to help. He hasn't been back That makes me sad. One can hope that he found a friendlier forum to gain advice. The only other alternative, that he muddles through, making mistakes with the litter. Something we could have prevented, if only a few on here hadn't stuck the boot in. Morals and ethics are important but human beings make mistakes! The sooner some Dogsey members stop being so "high and mighty" the sooner we can get people that need help to stick around, in effect helping their dogs - that's what forums are about, fun chatting to others about a subject you feel strongly about, as well as helping and being helped by others. Yes I will be in the middle of debate on occasion but I am not the one to usually start the "digging" but I'll never back away from bullies. Decent people need to stick together and stamp the bullies out!

There are some people on here with very strong opinions. I have debated with them on many subjects. However, that does not make them a bully in my eyes. The bullies know who they are

I'm really sad to hear that you suffered such appalling behaviour/treatment, at the hands of Dogsey members. It's shameful I'm glad you didn't let them win!

Yes, I like Spot and when she pulled me to bits on that particular thread I had no problem with it, as I said to a number of people at the time. The way other people did it I did have a problem with...it isn't what people say, it is the way that it is said.
I would not say Spot is wicked...dedicated and commited to what she feels strongly about yes.

Exactly "its not what you say its the way you say it " which is what i said a few posts back !

Well, obviously, you have a right to your opinion. You see dedication and commitment; I see nastiness and trouble-making. Each to their own, eh