*sigh* been asked to leave...

ok,im no angel, im the first to admit that - but i work ahrd, have 2 jobs, look after milie (dog) and my horse, pay for both - vet bills feeed etc - exercise them etc and pay for my car

im am stupid sometimes, i will walk past some ironing that needs taking upstairs etc - that kinda thing (i am 19 btw)! - thats my excuse

anyhow - if my mum said to me - clean the kitcen or hoover etc i woudl do it - but im that type of person who needs telling what to do around the house

btw - i live with my mum - they divorced 2 years ago - i lvoe my dad to bits, but they were better off apart

anyhow - the other week my room was a tip, i was getting a new carpet the next week to my mum said clean it now or move out.... (just cause i didnt tiy my room honestly!)

your probably thinking yeah right she has got to have done more than that - but honestly what ive just told you is al i did

i did tidy my room and she said no more about moving out etc

anyhow last nite i cam home from work she moaned that cause i put the washing out y;day on the maiden instead of on the line - and i didnt think about cleaning the garden up (bout 3 poos) - which i appologised for...

so then she said you have 2 weeks to get your act together or move out, so i said fine then, im gone....

i want to move out i really do, but i wont leave millie, and like i said i pay for my horse and car and go college!

id quit colllege tomorow and go work, id rather work - but how can i work lots of hours and afford my own house, (rented) and then still have time for millie (the horse can go on livery at 5 quida day), and afford everything???

i could go live with my dad but if im going to moveout id rather go on my own, please help! you lot talk sense and i rally need some good advice right now...

I moved out when I was 16. Its REALLY hard work. To be honest, I'd speak to your mum, and save like stink

yeah - im just sick of her asking me to leave - 3 times in total - i cant remember what the other thing was about - it was pathetic

thing is - she b in sh1t street without me, i looka fter the elders (dogs) in the day when shes at work, i want to move out tbh - my own 4 walls, no-one telling me what to do - it#d be ace - its just affording it

am i not able to get help of the coucil if i was classed as homeless??? cos technically i guess i would be cos shes chucking me out..

It isn't easy when you first move out although I think your mum is being a little harsh. Maybe speak to a careers advisor at the college and see what your options are.
Becky

yeah - she can be a complete cow sometimes - i lvoe her to bits, but she can be really mean

i will speak to a career advisor now.

thanks

Try to think practically, living on your own with the commitments you have, won't be easy, evan if you do get a job, why not try and talk to your mum, open and honestly, why does she want you to move out, you may think 'that's all I've done' but maybe it's a lot lot more to your mum, maye even things you are unaware of, as you say, sometimes you need to be told what needs doing, so try and find out, try and put things straight with her, at the moment it really will be the best thing to go along with what your mum wants at home, not just for you but your babies as well just my opinions
Christine

I would speak to your mum and try and sort out some kind of rota for housework etc. You are at college and your mum works so it would make sense to share the stuff at home.

This would give you time to save some money so you can leave home in your own time and not be rushed into something you will regret.

Please think carefully before doing anything you'll regret. Maybe your mum is just going through a rough patch, having lived with a man that was lazy and ignorant I know juast what its like when you have to do everything and the other person doesn't even notice that the hoovering or washing up needs doing.

Maybe she just wants you to help without having to keep asking. I think you will really regret it if you do move out, you won't be able to take your doggy with you, I think you'll find it nigh on impossible to rent somewhere that will allow you to have a dog, and what will you do with her when you're at work or college, it wouldn't be fair to leave her on her own. Plus you say you look after your mums dogs at the moment when she's at work, what about them, you have to think of them too as it isn't their fault that you two are not getting on.

I'm certain that, if you have a sit down and a chat with you mum, let her know that you want to do your bit and just need her to tell you what she would like you to do, then set yourself a rota, and just try to be a bit more thoughtful towards how she is feeling, I'm certain it will all work out and you'll both be happy living together.

I hope it all works out for you. xx

Hi Suze....

Gee I remeber those days and I am only 33, I moved back after splitting with my partner and couldnt stand the threats and I didnt leave 1st time around until I was 25!! But now I have my own mortgage and my own place Its 1 bedroom and I have me and 1 dog and a cat and I take home approximately £950 a month and I find that tight.

It really isnt easy and like I say I am 33. But yes it does have its plus sides. I don't know about where you are but here if youare declared homeless the council have a duty of care to find you accommodation but it reallly isnt usually a good route. Here they offer you a house and you basically have to take it as you are saying you are without a home, so you get offered the worst house in the worst condition in the worst area with the worst neighbours....not ideal. You can then ask to go on the waiting list for the decent areas but I put down for a council house in a "good area " when I was 18 and I got a letter about 3 months ago (to my mums address) saying I was now number 87 on the list for this area!!!

They can also offer you temporary accomodation in a hostel or B&B (depending on the councils policy) and tempoirary doesnt usually mean Temporary as we think of it ie a couple of weeks here people are in temporary accomodation often up to 2 years, and it is really unlikely you would be able to take your dog to the hostel or B&B.

Could you not sit down and draw a rota of chores with your mum? And as was already said save like crazy and keep your eye out for room flatmates wanted etc in the local area? And it probably is worth getting your name down on council and private letting agency lists so that at least you can get your name down for the areas where you would LIKE to stay, you never know whats around the corner..

Hope you can sort things out and at least stay where you are till you choose to move out rather than being forced...

i know - financially i cant really afford it -

i will talk 2 her but i think i will ask my dad if i can stay with him for a few weeks which i kno will probably hurt her - but tbh i think she needs it - cos shes hurts me by asking me to leave 3 times.