bad person or not (sorry long )

Hi folks here is a question id like some input on 4yrs ago my sis loss her huisband suddenly to a heart attack .Leaving her and threre 3 kids . They were married nearly 15yrs and her eldest daughter is 13yrs old her 2nd eldest daughter is 7 and her son is 5 , my query is she has met a new guy six mnths ago 1st person she has dated since her husband passed away she has recently been guiven the opportunity to go to cyprus in the summer with my oh and me ,the children dnt want to go though money ways it will be a struggle they have been offered but prefer to stay with her long standing friend of 10 yrs , whom the kids adore she is a great person and very trustworthy ,.
But my sis mother in law thinks she is neglecting the children BY GOING AWAY THE KIDS WILL BE WELL CARED FOR AND SAFE . so do you think she is wrong to do this as she has never left them in 14yrs except with me when she was haven her 2nd daughter and son . or does she be entitled to a break away , she plans to take the kids to spain later in the year to her oh parents apartment .(her ex mother in law thinks also she has met someone to soon )and dislikes her new bloke . your thoughts please
personally myself and the rest of the family feeel as long as the kids are safe and happy with it she deservesa break like anyone else .

sorry dk but her mother in law needs to get her head outta the clouds,shes only young and needs a life,her fella is very nice with a child of his own,i also see her point shes lost her son and maybe feels shes losing her grand kids,too.i would tell her to go on holiday 4 years of grieving just because shes got a new relationship going doesnt mean she loved her husband any less and her mom in law should get a head with the times,

Thanx zb her new bloke is fantastic and has gone out of his way with the mother in law ,i understand how she feels we all took his death badly i myself included had taken it terroible as he was more then my brother in law he was a good friend and helped me threw some rough times with my health but my sis loved him greatly and needed to move on and has met a greatr guy to do it with and most important the kids like and respect him he also has a son aged 15 who my sis an kids get on great with ,(she calls him scoob as he scuba dives ) her ex mother in law does not want her to meet anyone just to morn him forever

She deserves this holiday and as long as she's happy the kids will be looked after, why shouldn't she go. Grieving is a personal thing and 4 years is a long time. She still has to live her life and although she will never forget her husband, she deserves to be happy. xx

Totally agree with Wufflehoond on this one. 4 years is a long time. Perhaps MiL is feeling a bit insecure..... quite likely as she no longer has her son as the main link to her grandchildren. That's what it sounds like to me. She'll get over it, in time, but probably needs a little understanding. Just my opinion, anyway

She deserves all the happiness she gets in this life. I'd go on hols and have a lovely time if I was her.
I think her MIL will come round in time and so will the kids.
He sounds like a lovely man.

I couldn't agree more DK. As long as they are someone whom she trusts that they will not come into any harm theree should be no reason whatsoever for her not to go and enjoy herself with you.
It's not as if she were going and wasn't willing to take them with her - the fact of the matter is that they don't want to go.
if you ask me she should go, enjoy herself and rest and relax.

I agree with the others, 4 years is a long time, she needs to get back out and start enjoying life again, I'm sure her husband would not have wanted her to stop at home and mourn him for ever. The ex MIL probably is concerned about her position in the family if your sister got seriously involved with this other chap.

I think that so long as the kiddies are safe and sound then go for it, lifes too short not to enjoy it when you can.

The kids are going to be safe so tell your sister to go for it. It's only a few weeks out of the whole of her and their lives and they sound like the children are fine with it. If the kids had been unhappy about it then I would have said no but both parties will probably have a whale of a time!
Becky