Toughen up?

Why is it that the older I get the harder I find it is to deal with the rescue dog cases I see and hear about?

I volunteered for GSDRescue UK when I lived in England. I used to hire five kennels at a local boarding kennels and would deal with all the dogs coming in and out of my little section of the rescue. I would assess them, walk them every weekend to get a feel for their temperament and personality (I worked full time at that point as well as having my own rescue shep), and found the right homes for them as well as doing all the homechecks and paperwork. I found that, for the most part, I could keep myself detached and stayed professional.

However, since moving to Scotland and starting to volunteer for GSD Rescue Scotland, I have done loads of paperwork and phone calls (which is ideal for me with living in the sticks and having a small child) but have also got personally involved with a couple of the dogs. As soon as I spend any time with these rescue dogs I find them getting completely under my skin and then I fret for weeks and weeks about whether they have the right home, are happy in it etc etc.

Today I transported the 12 year old GSD girl halfway to her temp foster home and found myself practically howling all the way home Hers is a sad story, in that she has lived all her life with her elderly retired farmer owner on a beautiful, remote farm in the Scottish Borders. Her owner is now in a hospice with terminal cancer and hasn't long left to live She is a very kind, quiet and friendly girl and I am sure she must be wondering what the heck is going on.

I am beating myself up that I can't have her here with me, to ensure she gets the very best for the last few months/years of her life and hubby has even said we can try to work around the problems of her being here if it makes me happy, and less depressed and upset. Which is really lovely, he is one in a million, but in my heart of hearts I know my situation is not ideal for her (with all the other dogs being around).

How does anyone else in rescue work toughen up and not let each dog get under your skin to the point where you find yourself bawling about the unfairness of life?

Sorry to go on, but I really needed to let this out tonight, and where better than among other dog lovers

I can't answer this - but I do love it when I have played a part in the good side of rescue - homechecking an excited family who are perfect for a rescue dog.

But on the flip side - holding the paw of a puppy who has to be PTS for dangerous aggression (bad bad breeding) has to be the worst thing in the World and I still am haunted by it

i cant Kirsty, which is why I am currently not doing it, I am hoping down to the extra hormones I was just getting myself overwrought, but I felt so much like I was fighting a losing battle with dogs being returned etc that I had no choice but to take a step back for a while

Its just so much isnt it !

I often wonder is having children make us soft? more emotional?

I howl when I home my pups its so upsetting for me, I get really upset over rescue dogs that have had a hard time, so much so that in the past when they have came they stayed, its a hard thing to stay at arms length from them, xx

I couldn't either and I don't have the extra hormones.

I really don't think people realise just how hard work being involved in rescue is - it emotionally drains you. I think I lasted a year because there were more good endings to bad ones, but when the credit crunch started to bite, the rescue I helped out as was overwhelmed and I just found it too much (plus I had taken on Tip and needed to spend more time with my own).

I know it was completely the wrong time to give up helping out, but I realised I was starting to harden my heart too much. I'd go and clean the kennel blocks and feed the dogs with as minimal contact as possible because it hurt too much to get close to them and knowing (for some of them) that there chances of finding a home was so slim. I decided that I wasn't doing myself or them any favours.

I would like to help out again at some stage, but with the limited free time I have, feel that I should spend more of it with my own dogs.

Sorry Moobli - not really a 'cheering up' post for you.

But I would say, look what a difference you have made to Yid. Yes she might be unsure of what is going on just now, but dogs soon bounce back and you have at least given her the chance of a happy ever after ending.

(hugs)

I remember when I was asking about fostering that someone told me its great but it leaves a pocket in your heart for every dog
At the moment my weepyness is holding me back from what I can do for rescues - even walking around dogs trust with friends looking for a dog has me balling

mind you I have heard that border collie rescue UK is opening in Scotland - if its close I think that will be the boost I need
- the only thing close enough to me at the moment is the cat and dog home and I dont like how they work

I am getting softer as I get older. But I also think some people are tougher than others and that some people learn to be tougher.

I am trying hard not to get as involved but I don't hold out a lot of hope. It does do you in in the end.

Hope the girl finds a great place to end her days---I am sure she will. Brownie points to you for giving a hand to her.

rune

I also get a great buzz from chatting to prospective new owners who are all excited about getting a new dog, and who tick all the right boxes, especially when I find out they have homed a new dog and are loving it

But how on earth did you manage to stay sane when being with the pup who had to be pts? That must have been terrible.

Knowing how upset and depressed I have been just recently about the rescue dogs, I think you have definitely done the right thing in taking a step back for the timebeing Dani. It really does emotionally drain you, especially when working for rescues who do get a huge volume of unwanted dogs through such as Staffie and GSD rescue Do you hope to start up again when the baby is born?

The simple answer is you don't, 4 years we have been doing it and i have at least 50 little holes on my heart for everydog that i have had the pleasure of giving another chance to, when the time comes to rehome fudge it will break my heart, but i will see him off with a smile while i'm dying inside.

All rescues are busier than ever and getting busier, tough decisions are being made everyday, and its absolutely soul destroying, but we carry on, because if we don't who will