Play wrestle...Do or Don't??

My 13 year old son loves to play wrestle with our black lab. OUr dog loves it. They just play in the living room on the floor. He holds her down on the floor and then lets her hold him down on the floor. They basically 100% wrestle in a human/person kind of way. Our dog nibbles on my son but in a playful kind of way. Our dog loves it and gets so excited when my son wants to pkay wrestle.
My question is: Is this a do or a don't? Any advice from anyone?

Personally I wouldn't recommend this at all, I appreciate they are both enjoying it at the moment but it is a game that can easily end up getting out of hand as it is sending the wrong signals to your dog.

You say your dog 'nibbles at my son but in a playful kind of way' - the dog is testing here, the 'playbites' can get more and more forceful as the dog tries to test the boundaries. Puppies play-bite each other to test their strength and dominance, dogs need to taught not to do this with humans, there have been many cases where it has lead to the dogs continuing what was cute as a puppy into them drawing blood as adults, as they assert themselves.

Wrestling should be stopped as the dog will see your son as a litter-mate and treat him as another dog and act accordingly. He holds her down on the floor and then lets her hold him down on the floor - -. By treating him as another dog you will be giving your dog the wrong signals. Dogs only understand the rules of the pack, by floor wrestling and allowing play-bites,the dog will not see your son as someone he should obey and will assert dominance.

I would stop him doing this immediately if I were you - he can play with your dog many other ways that are much more suitable. A game of fetch is ideal, always make sure your son ends up with the toy though and always end the game when he wants not when the dog says so. By doing this the dog understands that the leader is the one to instigate play and end up with the prize and he will understand his pack role better as subordinate.

Thank you for your reply to my post. I've taken a lot of what you have said into consideration. I just want to make one point. Our dog is an adult. She's almost 2 yrs old. So that's why I thought her nibbling in a playful way was ok, cause she's no longer a puppy. However everything else you've said makes a lot of sense. Our dog doesn't obey my son at all. She does once a while but not the way she should. My son always questions it so I guess I can give him a better reason considering you've pointed out that his play wrestling with her can lead to her thinking he's one of her cause he's on the floor with her wrestling. So I guess I'll tell me son no more wrestling and just stick to Tug Of War. Tug of war is ok, right?

Hi - I would just like to say that Anne-Marie has given some super advice and I would agree with all she has said.

IMO I think there are much better games to play with the dog which can be rewarding to both - find the ball, fetch - the list is endless really - your son and the dog will hopefully both get much more from these games than wrestling which as Anne-Marie has stated can be sending the wrong signals to the dog.

All the best,

My daughter used to do this with my wee Shar pei Suki, I used to tell her not to because sooner or later Suki would show her who the boss was and lucky for Emma she did but did'nt have to break skin to show her, I heard Emma scream and ran through into the living room to see Suki with Emmas arm in her mouth she was gnawing at it just enough to show Emma she had had enough, Needless to say Emma did'nt play with her like that again. We don't do it with Inka and Kain.

I'll play wreslte gently with roxy but I always start the game and finish the game, and I never let her win. Usually it ends up into a tug of war game anyway

I use to wrestle with Storm and do now and then with Star, but i always start it and always finish it and if a feel any teeth it stops there and then, and have no probs. I honestly feel it depends on the dog, I would never do it if they started to show bad signs from it.

Yes my son always starts and finishes the wrestling. He doesn't let our dog tell him when to wrestle and when to stop. He's in control of that. And there haven't been any bad signs from it. Except of course that our dog rarely listens to my son when it comes to telling her to sit, or stay, etc. He's her play toy. I tell her that his catagory to the dog is his play buddy so she thinks she doesnt need to listen to him. 95% of the time she listens to me, and about 85% of the time she listens to my husband. Overall she's a great do she just has her stubborn moments and sometimes we'll tell her to do something and she just sit there and stare at us until we attempt to get up then she listens. Shes like a little kid.
So I guess Stromey is somewhat right too, it depends on the dog and also keeping an eye on any bad signs. If anything I'll just try to monitor my sons wrestling behavoir with our dog. If I see any signs that I disagree with i'll stop it. But in the meantime i guess because she hasnt shown any bad signs and my son hasnt gotten hurt (knock on wood) then I'll just monitor it the best that I can, and I guess we'll see what happens.

I like a bit of rough and tumble with my two. It's not something my son really does so not sure about that one. Anne Marie has given some good advice I guess. But if they are gona play fight, just make sure your there to supervise and stop it if the dog (or the child ) gets too excited.

Okay, I'll play devils advocate here - the fact that you raised the issue initially in the thread I am guessing you have misgivings about your son play-wrestling this way is that correct?

The bits highlighted above say to me a great deal - the fact that she "rarely" listens to your son, "he is her play-toy" and that she seems to really only obey you (husband less so) speaks absolute volumes to me.

Whilst other members may be able to play with their dogs in this manner and have no behavioural problems is fabulous - HOWEVER your dog is already misbehaving, ignoring your sons commands and to some extent your and your husbands also. This dog is confused as to her status in your household (her pack) - she clearly sees your son as subordinate and of course is completely happy to tussle and wrestle with him as a play-buddy and as she sees him as in your own words "a play-toy" she has no respect for him at all. Not only that she is also going to try and work her way up the ladder and already testing the boundaries by disobeying your commands.

I am not trying to frighten you here, but I truly believe if you don't nip this in the bud she will make a more vigorous effort to assert her dominance in the pecking order.

The fact that she is 2yrs old rather than placate me worries me more, she should have grown out of that habit of play-biting long before now, all mouthing is unacceptable and she should be made to stop before the pressure of her bites get harder.

I would start doing little basic obedience stuff with her like sits,downs for short periods, keep her occupied even if it is teaching her tricks. Don't allow her to barge through doors in front of you make her sit go through first then allow her through. If she pulls on the lead don't let her do it. Make sure all games are started & ended by yourselves, don't let her grab toys and keep them - all these things are gentle ways of re-asserting dominance and she will eventually know her place and be better behaved