I know you would xxx

[QUOTE=scorpio;1060948]Oh Helena, I'm so, so sorry to hear this dreadful news.

If the worse comes to the worse do you have to make the decision on Friday? If she is suffering I can totally understand but, if she isn't, would they be able to make her comfortable so that you can both enjoy a while longer?

I know that whatever happens you will do the best for Cassie, even though it will break your heart, and my thoughts are with you.

Please give her as many hugs from me as you can manage to fit in, between those from you and all her other Dogsey fans.


Thanks Sheree, but quite honestly, I think she's suffering enough deep down to be this quiet, and I already asked him just now whether she is an urgent case and I would bring her in straight away, to which he replied she's not particularly "urgent", but yes, she could well be suffering because of the way she's acting and the size of the tumour (now he's admitted that it IS one!). It all comes down to her quality of life really. Cassie is a very energetic, hyper type dog, bit like a collie in that respect, and to see her so quiet and unresponsive, to see her unable to sleep upside down, not wanting to play with Georgie anymore, struggling in the afternoons to go out in the front garden for a wee and get back again to lie down, to see her just lying with her head in her front paws etc. etc. it's quite heartbreaking for me having had her for 11 1/2 years, so I won't take much convincing when I see this specialist on Friday Iknow that now. If he thinks there's the remotest chance they CAN do something about it, then obviously I'll let them go ahead, but if she were your dog, wouldn't you rather say goodbye being close beside her, holding her in your arms, or say goodbye with them taking her away to cut her open
only to put her to rest under the aneasthetic? I will think long and hard before Friday, chat with Dave tonight, but I think my mind's made up at the moment for HER, not me, coz I'm in shreds here!

Thanks for the hugs, she more than deserves them after what she's going through, I'm off to cuddle her right now and have a good old cry.xxx

Thanks Vicki, that would make me feel better, but I wouldn't be able to talk (for once!) I'm really upset here as you can imagine. This is worse than when I had to lose the horse it really is, I was quite strong for that even though I'd had him 20 years! She means the world to me this dog, she really does.

Awww thanks Wolfie, that's very kind of you, but I'm afraid it just wouldn't help. Not even Dave being there is gonna make me feel any better. Sometimes you just have to go it alone when you want to be strong I think? That's me anyway. I'm worse if I've got a shoulder to cry on I think!Thank you sooooo much though and you Vicki, I know you'd try and be there too for me if you could. xxxx

Aww, poor little love, I totally agree with you, if she has gone so quiet and is having trouble even getting into her favourite position for sleeping etc., then yes I think you're right in that the time has come. I have a few friends who have dragged out those last few weeks when the dog is clearly suffering and I simply couldn't do it to them, it is, as you say, far better to say goodbye when they still have their dignity and are not in so much pain as they could be. And to be holding them close for those last moments is so important to me, I understand exactly what you are saying and feeling.

I'm thinking of your Helena, and just wish I could do something to take your pain away.

Take care xxxxx

oh no

But do they no if it has spread anywhere? It's such a dilema I would be so tempted to have this removed because it may not come back, but without knowing if it has spread or not it's so hard.

I guess talking with the tissue specialist will tell you so much more. I wish that there would be a way out of this, I really do.

Aww poor you and Cassie *sigh* *hugs for you both* Don't know what else to say other than I really feel for you

Oh, Helena, I'm so sorry to hear.

I agree that some things we have to do by ourselves and the final decision will of course be yours. However the one reason it may be worth taking someone with you when you see the specialist is that sometimes when we are very emotional, we don't take in everything that is being said - your OH or a close friend being there might not be a bad idea to make sure you've registered everything the specialist is telling you and to perhaps ask questions you may be to distracted to think of.

((Hugs)) to you - its a horrible decision you will have to make, but no-one has any doubts that which ever way it goes, you will make the right one.

Take care xx

Thanks Mys. I know you do! I know in my heart, it's got too big to do anything. It was so sudden and so quickly it got to the size it has. I don't like the way it's grabbing hold of her spine either. It's an old injury, and as he explained to me, 99% of the time when they remove large cysts from an existing old injury they always grow back. I can't bear to see her suffering any longer. It's only been 10 days since I originally saw another vet about the size it had grown to and she wasn't concerned at that time. It was only my instinct that made me take her AGAIN last Friday morning for the biopsy, and even then he told me he didn't think it was anything sinister didn't he. Now he's changed his tune, especially when he said he can't lance it because if I remembered he couldn't get much out of it last Friday so what would be the point. If you could see this huge lump, you'd have the same opininion as me about things, it's very warm to the touch, it's constantly oozing blood, although at a trickle, and it's bursting to erupt, it's so very hard to the touch. It's visciously grabbing her on the shoulder and spine, and quite honestly, if it's got this big in only ten days, I really don't want it to spread any further and cause her any more suffering than she has already gone through. She's not a dog to complain, but deep down, I know she's suffering, quietly. She's very special in every way, she's not the type to whinge and let me know she's in pain. If I picked up the lead right now, she'd make it to the car! Bless! I know her so very well and I owe it to her to say goodbye whilst she still has her dignity. xxx

Thanks Hali. Trouble is, I tried that with the vet just now, i.e. questioning all the options, and to my mind (whilst I was still in normal mode) he was definitely veering on the side of putting her to sleep. Instead of saying he wanted me to see the soft tissue specialist to talk about the options, he actually said "to talk about the pro's and cons of the surgery" because I said I wanted her to have the operation. In effect, I've read between his lines, now that I've sat back and thought about what he said, and what sticks out most in my mind is his words about "enough is enough" don't you think??? She's a lovely old girl he said and do we really want to put her through it when we know these things can cause more problems down the line. That's what's got me where I am on this now. Obviously, I will see how the land lies when I see this man, but Iknow in my heart what the outcome will be - I've sort of got a 6th sense about these things. I knew it was something bad, and I cried in front of him when I took her back Friday, and yet he insisted it was all ok and not to worry. I think through his expedrience, he's seen these test results before perhaps don't you? Maybe. Thanks for your caring thought for us, I know how sincere you all are on here.xxx

Take care xx[/QUOTE]

I would see what is available to help her, if in fact anything left to give her quality of life back.
Some times your so stressed out you don't hear all the facts or take vital info in, i would at least sleep on it for a day or so.
Your going down there on friday, thinking this is it because of the info you have been given, some times you don't get all the info over the phone until its face to face.
We recently had a scare with tob thinking he had a tumor some type of skin cancer and i was thinking all sorts.
I know shes a old girl and you only want the best for her, but i would be 100% in my own mind about the facts before i did anything.
They took a biopsy of tobys mass and found out it wasn't cancerous it was type of cyst caused by an infection under the skin caused by e coli it hasn't come back although it took a good few weeks to go.
With the right care she'll come round after the op, not all tumors come back fast and grow huge again, without knowing the type and nature i don't think it is really fair to give you that impression.
If you intend to go alone get a list of questions together before friday.
If cassie has a chance i know your'll take it, i just fear you being upset, not hearing all the facts and saying goodbye.
Its very hard to stay focused in the situtation and think rashionally when your an emotion wreck.