Smiled through the tears...........

The house seemed horribly empty and quiet this morning. Didn't feel right at all. But then, as I wiped my eyes dry I suddenly smiled for the first time. Instead of thinking "where's my boy gone - I want to see him" I thought "wow.........Toby isn't going to wake up this morning and struggle like crazy to get out of his bed and mess himself as he tries his hardest to walk to the back door. He isn't going to be left all on his own while I go to work and possibly need me because he's in pain .......... or worse. He is where he deserves to be at 20years old - at peace, pain free and happy again".

I hurt for me and my daughter but I am being strong for her. I know it will take me a while to get used to him not being here anymore but I must keep telling myself that he wouldn't want to be here.

Do you know the last thing he did (and this will always make me smile for as long as I live).........Rebecca and myself gave him a kiss goodbye just before it happened and he licked up both on the chin (he didn't do things like that usually). I truly believe that it was his way of saying "thankyou mummy". I think he knew and was grateful

Thank you again everyone for giving me the strength to see this through and for telling me about Rainbow Bridge as I had never heard of it before and now I am happy to know that he will live on - but in a nicer place

xxxxxxx

Hi Tracy, I delayed taking the ultimate decision with a couple of my dogs but eventually admitted to myself that I was keeping them going not for their benefit for for mine because I couldn't bear the thought of being without them.

Once the agonising decision to let a dog go is taken a weight is removed and sadness is mixed with relief. I look at it this way, letting a dog go is a small price to pay for years of companionship. xx

aw Traceyjane, that is lovely. That's right, he's over the bridge now, with his friends feeling no pain, and one day you will meet him again. Well done for making such a noble decision xxx



Mummy, please don't mourn for me,
I'm still here, though you don't see.
I'm right by your side each night and day,
And within your heart I long to stay.


My body is gone but I'm always near,
I'm everything you feel, see or hear.
My spirit is free, but I'll never depart,
As long as you keep me alive in your heart.


I'll never wander out of your sight.
I'm the brightest star on a summer night.
I'll never be beyond your reach.
I'm the warm moist sand when you're at the beach.


I'm the colorful leaves when fall comes around,
And the pure white snow that blankets the ground.
I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond,
The clear cool water in a quiet pond.


I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring,
The first warm raindrop that April will bring.
I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine,
And you'll see that the face in the moon is mine.


When you start thinking there's no one to love you,
You can talk to me through the Lord above you.
I'll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees,
And you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze.


I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep,
And the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep.
I'm the smile you see on a baby's face.
Just look for me, friend, I'm everyplace!

Im so glad you can see the good in what you had to do. You dont need to worry about Toby anymore, he is young again. It takes time to adjust to a life without them in it but with time you will. Instead of tears when you think of him, you'll have smiles for all the years of joy you had with him. And dont worry, there are lots of Dogsey dogs at Rainbow Bridge, waiting to show him the ropes. xx

And Akitagirl, that was a beautiful poem. Made my tears flow!