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Location: Essex UK
Joined: May 2006
Posts: 6,949
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Hi pidge,
I am sorry you seem to be having these problems with dear little woody.
It seems to me you have always tried too hard to get it right and be a good mum. Nothing wrong in that but I think you worry about it which he picks up on and being very clever takes advantage.
I remember saying when he was smaller that I thought you gave him too much exercise for one so young. The reason behind me saying this was it stimulates them into wanting more and more as they grow, which makes life harder and harder for you. Its not all about joint problems in later life its about teaching them to rest and relax. I have had hyper dogs, my Shady is one but as a pup I would give minimal exercise (her reason is she is a large dog and I did worry about her joints) I would play a few mind games with her and then ignore her and just get on with things.
Her and Milo are the first dogs in 30 odd years that I had to crate as pups when I was out to stop them harming themselves by being destructive and eating something dangerous.
Milo has possesive behaviour but its not actually a problem, because I don't allow him anything he can be possesive over like a bone unless its an hour before food time. Then I can feed him and as he eats his food I remove the bone.
I never remove my dogs food when they are eating and never have done. None of my other dogs including Shady would bother if i did but milo would so i don't give him the opportunity to show aggression by even trying. its pointless and there is no reason for it. If I was hungray and eating a nice meal and someone kept sticking thier hand on my plate and removing it my goodness would I fly for them I would be so annoyed and some dogs feel that way too.
Sometimes I want to move Milo from where he is sitting on my bed or the sofa, he will growl if I try and push him off, so I never push him off. I just calmy lift the sofa cushion or the duvet cover so he has to get up and off and then I sit down and call him up for a cuddle. No aggression shown I have what i want and he is invited then to join me. Once I have invited him I can move him easily at any time because I was there first and he seems to accept that.
So you see although Milo could be absolutly awful that way he isn't because I don't give him the chance or any opportunity for confrontation.
The only other dog I ever had that showed any aggression was my first CKCS and the only time was as a pup she would growl and snap at you was if you tried to towel dry her if she got wet. So I stopped towel drying her as I think it was through fear. When she got older and more confident I tried again and she actually enjoyed it from that day on.
Had I persisted or made a big thing of it when she was a pup it could have escalated into a real problem.
What I am trying to show here is there is always a calm way to get your dog to do things without getting flustered or making an issue of it. Don't make an issue of it, they don't understand English, only your body language and your emotions. making an issue causes an issue.
Being cross or upset just makes them hyper. Think calmly and carefully before rushing in to move him or stop him doing something. There is always an alternative easy calm quiet way to get what you want without force.
My two love me to play with them and would keep me playing all day. But I will throw toys for them and after 5 mins or so I just say thats it now mummys got things to do, and they come on in and settle down. They didn't used to settle straight away but I would ignore all thier attempts to carry it on and if they then started to be naughty I would get a stuffed kong or some time out. So they learn't they were wasting thier time to keep trying to get me back playing.
If they needed more than a five minute game I would add onto that 5 mins training and then stop always telling them thats it now so they learn that I am not going to carry on and they must settle down.
I always instigate play and never play because they demand it. its my choice not thiers when I will do things and they are only too happy to join in when I start.
I will never play with my dogs in the evening when I want to sit down and they now naturally settle for the evening. I am tired and want some rest myself and they have to respect that and that comes by ignoring any silly behaviour but encouraging cuddles and relaxation in the evening together.
Good Luck I hope you manage to work round your problems together as I think you could both have a very happy enjoyable future together.