Emotionally drained.... and cars, who'd have em?

Get ready for a ramble!

Monday.... am working and nipping along to meet up with another carer when I notice a car behind me as I pull into the car park. The police
I have a headlight out and my two indicators at the back at 'too white', I need bulbs that are more orange .... oh and apparently I'd beat Colin McRea anyday and they had trouble catching me up! But as I am in uniform they let us get on.

Tuesday... go to start car and my foot gets stuck under the accelerator pedal. It goes up... and won't come down. I ring the OH who says something about my big feet, but as he's getting ready to come and fix it I sit in the gutter outside Argos reaching up into the insides of my car and fix it myself. Hoorah! But still feel a bit silly for panicking.

I also am on call and at 4pm get a call from a carer worried about one of our clients who is dying. She's been ill for weeks and is def on her way, but no one has sorted anything out for her except she's had the last rites etc. Her son has visited, reluctantly, but is now going home and wants to know if we will 'pop in'. Now hang on, I'm not letting anyone die on their own so spring into action. I call everyone, nurses, hospice etc. They ring the son and demand he has to drive the 3 hours back and stay with her. District nurse rings the GP, who had visited that morning and says she is fine Nurse is furious.
Anyway, Son says he can't get here til midnight so I say 'I'll stay'. I was not going to leave. Another carer, my friend, joined me and I spent 6 hours with each of us holding the 96 year old lady's hands watching her breathing whilst chatting away..... only stopping when her breathing stopped . He eventually arrived at 10.30pm so I went home..... knackered.

Today..... lady is still with us but Son planning to leave again without anything being sorted. Nurses insist she needs to be somewhere as cannot be left alone to just die, but Son won't have it and says he has someone coming to stay the night. We think he means the hospice nurse, which they don't do. Anyway, I realise I left my bag at the lady's house and pop back mid-morning to find him leaving. Lady now all on her own.
I get back into my car..... it dies on me
OH not answering phone (he is a mechanic lol) so RAC called. Same patrolman who came the last time I called them... and he remembered .
Battery is dead. Takes me to the garage to get new battery fitted. I have my only cash on me before lunch, £70.
Battery costs? £69.99.... so 1p left for lunch. Even penny chews are more than that now .
Back to work until 6.30. Was suppose to go swimming at 7.30 but had to pay £40.....money gone on new battery. At this point the will has left me. I can't be bothered to go get some cash. I'm tired, mentally exhausted and have now come on... right in the middle of someone dying. You have to laugh.

But.... tomorrow is another day, my day off! Yes the world did not end today. Yes there are some right sh1tebags on this earth. Yes I am drained and could do with a bloody good cry but I love that bit of my job, is a priviledge to be with someone near the end..... and yes, sometimes my OH comes good when I get home from something like that to find he's missed me and has been out to buy me cider and a bar of galaxy for when I got home.

I feel better for getting that off my chest.

Phew! Becky - that 's a week and a half in a few days!

Hope you have a chilled out day off today *hugs*

Blooming 'eck Becky, you don't do things by halves do you! Except maybe the Galaxy, you might have done that by half, otherwise you risk being sick just like I was last night after eating half a chocolate fudge cake and whipped cream - not good!!!

I enjoyed spending that day with you, you've worn me out now! You've also just touched a nerve with me, coz I'm soooooo hoping I can be there holding my mum's hand when she departs, I'll make darn sure of it anyhow!

Enjoy your well earned day off slobbing around with Galaxy bars in your hand! xxxx

Well today I have hoovered upstairs, squashed the recycling and sorted the 3 wheelie bins out, clipped the guinea pigs claws and put them out. Cleaned them out..... hamster is next, after I've put the dishwasher on.
Just sitting having a cup of tea and home made bread and honey, which I also made yesterday lol.

I have already had a vent at pcworld who have taken £8.99 out of my bank from when we bought the OH's new laptop even though I cancelled as soon as we got home... and now I have to put it in writing to get my money back!
.....and yes I thought of you H!

Pat I really must book in for a reflexology session (even if it is just an excuse to come and see Missy ).

you're welcome any time Becky - give us a bit of notice and come down on a day off - more time with MissyChief then

Awww Becky, hope you are having a rest now.
Just watch you don't stop in your tracks you keep going for a while then it all comes crashing down. Try to take a bit of me time.

Good grief, woman, I'm not surprised you're emotionally drained. I'm knackered just reading that!

x0x