A little dog's BIG problem - aggression, separation anxiety

Hello all ,
well as you know not so long ago Polly our 6 and a half year old JRT had a dicky incident with the box of chocolates and is very lucky to still be here, well since then she has sort of just been resting and returning to her old self. Well this is where the problems have begun again, now certain DW members of which i speak to on MSN have been told what she is like and why in our cul-de-sac all the little children call her the Queen Of Darkness , but it is really getting out of hand so i thought i would get your advice.
Polly our JRT is slightly now ever so slightly brain damaged from a stroke she had a few years back, but the vet has assured us that this isnt the reason for her problems, now Polly was a rescue we adopted her at 6 months, she had been kept in awful conditions with far to many dogs and just had generally a poor life.
Now we adopted her at 6 months, and at the time we had 1 elderly and deaf SBT and a couple of cats but they all kept Polly in line, but as time took a hold we had, had Polly a mere 3 months when our elderly SBT was PTS through old age, and from this she began to sort of become 'obssesed' i suppose. She began to become my shadow, and i dont mean like your average dog i mean compulsive, before my illness to a hold and i went to public school she would hide under my bed all day until i returned hom, generally she had to be 2 steps behind me, and she is still like this today i.e i go to the bathroom she waits by the door, im in bed she sleeps on the pillow beside me, im having breakfast she sits on my feet, im on the PC she is asleep on the back of the swivel chair, but i digress.
So our elderly SBT had died, and she began to be my shadow, and then 1 day my friends and i were messing around on the bouncy castle for my birthday and one of them fell on me and she went nuts and lunged at them. And this sort of protectiveness become more and more frequent, she is allways at her peak say if im sitting on the couch and she's on my lap and someone sits next to me she will growl and growl continuoslly (sp?) until they move. Yet again i digress, so back to when it all started.
We had, had her like 18 months when she had a stroke and this left her with a heart problem, it isnt life threatning but its a worry, and of course slightly brain damaged as she wasn't breathing for some time, she is normal except when she gets excited she can sometimes wet herself, and she grunts, and sometimes dribbles when she concentrates for too long. So after spending months recouping she was back to her feet, but in her time of recouping, i had been diagnosed with my illness, causing me to be home schooled and at home for most of the time, so she spent most of her 'recouping' time with me, and she began to become even more obssesive over me. The outcome her now not leaving me at all, even when i have tuition to this day she has to sit on my feet, she also became more possesive over me with people and other animals, and this is when her aggressiveness to dogs on walks started. She generally became like a stalker, we became inseperable. During this time her attacking of people and other animals and people became worse, and i guess i made it worst by if she was on my lap and went for sum1 putting my arm out to sort of push them away, she probably saw me doing this as a signal to do it moreso infact thinking about it she usually got worse.
But now, now she has started to out do even her own standards, she attacks Florrie if she gets to close too me, as she does with Clementine, she killed one of our rabbits as she saw me 1 day giving him a cuddle, she barks at every1 and everything, if i sit down she has to sit on me, if i walk around she has to walk basically in between my legs, she has to do everything and go everywhere with me. Now recently i have sort of started to live more despite my illness, which often means going out with friends etc to places that isnt dog friendly meaning Polly has to stay at home, and its like when i do she hides under the bed till i return and then when i do she wont come near me for ages and when she does she will give me a hard bite as if to tell me off and then she will sit on me.
She has generally become a nightmare, now i know its my fault for babying her way to much but i need help and advice, any ideas on whats the cause?
And any ideas on what to do to assist in curing the problem?
oh and BTW she has been checked by the vet who has confirmed it isnt medical.
As you can tell from the size of my post and probably the rambling content i really am at my wits end, looks like we will be on the next series of 'Its me or the dog'
Best wishes

Luke I think you know well what the cause is from the explanations in your post Sounds to me like severe separation anxiety, which means you either have to work bl**dy hard to sort it out, or you have got to put up with Polly being a ball and chain for the rest of her ife!

Have a look at my post about the behaviourist coming over... it may give you some ideas

Maybe I'm wrong and it's something else... others will be along to advise soon

thought i would add, as i cant edit the original post Polly isnt just agressive with certain people, its basically everyone, she can have her times when she is a sweet little dolly ie in the provided picture but there are times when she is a downright nightmare, so please, please, please i need your advice!

Thanks Tuti, yes i do have a feeling it is that right off to look at your thread about the behavourist now

right well update of this mornings events
having tuition and as i have mentioned due to Polly's obbsessive need to eb near me all the time she has to lie on my feet during my tuition periods, thankfully my tutors find it amusing and dont mind, but today oh today
part of my holiday work in english was to creat a visual story, with like little secnes to tell the story instead of words all part of the interprutive (sp?) english module we are doing, but today i was finishing part of this thing off and needed to be able to move around etc so shut Polly out of the room, awell just came upstairs to be greeted by my bed defocated on and it was done by her as she was sitting on the bed next to it, and the fact Florrie was asleep in the spare room, so after cleaning away the 'defocation' and chainging the bed and a lot of cleaning i am now at my wits end, more than before!!!!!!!!!

Hi Everyone, people hav viewed this thread but only Tuti has replied, i need your advice and information DESPERATLEY, things have got worse and polly has become a somewhat more aggressive
Best wishes

I'm sorry Luke but i have absolutely no idea as to what you can do

hi don't know if u watch that programme on channel4 called its the dog or me, well last nite there was a dog on there whose behaviour was very similer to wot is ahppening with you.
to stop the dog going for people while your holding him try this
if he growls barks or bites any1 sitting next to u try putting him straight on the floor. thats wot they had to do & it worked. she even at one point removed the dog from the room for 3 mins. i don't know if this will help you or if its just a load of rambling from me lol. but it mite be worth a try

Luke have you tried going back to basics with her and teaching her where she belongs in the pack? Try the NILF (Nothing in life is free programme) It seems that she may have gotton a little bit spoilt lateley I may be wrong could this be the case?

Either way the NILF programme should help you. You and your family will have to change your behaviour in order to change hers.

Try this link:

http://k9deb.com/nilif.htm

Hi Luke I am so sorry I missed your post .I often miss theads when I am working...This is a hard one I am afraid..

There are things I can suggest to you to try but knowing the history of Polly (from your posts and past PMs) and her stroke like episodes/brain damage I am not sure it will work..
Sometimes when dogs have problems we have to accept them for what they are...I have come to realise this with Amy and her little eccentricities ..like only walking one way across the field not around it..and refusing to sit on my knee and other oddities. I think when dogs are old like Amy or ill like Polly we have to make allowances .

Thread 35 here will tell you about desensitising Polly to get her used to not being with you .

...if you can make this work she may be less protective of you..I would then move on to removing her to another room when she is agressive to people , no word no look nothing.

You can as Dibley says try NILIf too ...and that would help but as I have said previously I am not sure how much Polly is now capable of learning /accepting now ..