Do I have a right?

Ok I've always been told that before I was born my dad had a daughter with another woman who when I was born moved away with her daughter, and when my dad tried to get in contact all letters were returned un-opened, but I found out through [a social network] that her daughter lives in Dorset and has a daughter of her own, but for a while I've wanted to get in contact with her but do I have a right too? I don't know if she knows who her dad is, so I was thinking of getting in contact with her mum, but the only way I could do this is through [a social network] and this don't seem right, and do I even have a right to get in contact with them when they could be perfectly happy on their own? I also might have another half sister but I don't know anything about her apart from the fact tgat she also moved away...and I wonder why people have told me to go on Jeremy Kyle.

hmm tough one! I would say yes, you do have a right to contact her. She is your half sister and I think she has a right to know about you if she doesnt already.

She may tell you to get lost but at least you will know you have tried to contact her, its upto her if she wants anything to do with you. I wouldnt contact her mum through that website, you could run this risk of her mum causing problems for you. I would contact your half sister directly, explain the situation and why you have contacted her. If I was your half sister I would want to know about you and my real dad, she may not though but thats the risk you take.

You could risk upset the apple cart so to speak but then it could end up being one of the best things that have happened to you and her.

If you dont get in contact are you always going to be thinking about it? Lifes to short to not take a risk. All I would say is if your going to do it, then do it tackfully and dont expect too much.

HTH

My dad has gone on to have children with his new girlfriend so I have 2 half sisters (and a "step" sister, if they ever got married - the girlfriend's, from a previous relationship)
I don't speak to my dad so I don't have a relationship with my halfsisters. I know about them, they know about me, sometimes they've been here visiting my brother when I've got home and I'll say hello but I don't really think of them like close family.
Maybe when they're older they may decide to contact me to try to build a relationship - I certainly won't be offended if they try, I'm just not sure if I would have that much in common with them or ever really consider them family!
The situation is a little different to yours but I would say get in touch - even if it's via the internet. At the end of the day, the worst they could do is say no, and as you have no relationship with them now, you've got nothing to lose.

I'm 26 next month, I haven't seen my 'dad' for about 20 years and don't want to see him either. I'm led to believe he went on to have two other children but, again, they have got nothing to do with me and I'm not interested in them or their lives.

If it was me in your position, I wouldn't bother. However, if you do try to get in contact with them, then do it carefully and don't get your hopes up, just like someone has said previously to my post.

Do it!

I have a half brother from a similar situation. I knew nothing about him until he contacted me.
To say I was shell shocked is an understatement.
Having contacted me and given me all the info and details I needed to check the story out he stepped back and left the ball in my court to make the decisions of where to go from there.
I got back in contact with him and we have become very close.
I now have a fantastic SiL, 2 nieces, a nephew and great nieces and nephews I never knew I had. We have all become very close.

Yowsers, I'll definitely pass on contacting mine!

happened to my son...my ex's ex contacted one of my children through the internet.....as my ex had never told my children (who are older) that they had a half sister they were not happy with the situation....

sue

Thanks all for your experiences, I think I want to do and have for a while, but I feel guilty that I know about this and she might not, I do believe that her mum knows that my dad has me and my two younger brothers, as oddly she has one of my family members on FB but I think that she cut all ties with my dad, and I think I know why as I have been told something about her which makes me wonder whether she just wanted a kid, but not a father, but if I do this I have to be prepared for it to all blow up in my face, espcially as right now all I know about my sister is her name, where she lives and that she has her own child now too.

Because I am very family orientated and love being in the company of my family, I cannot imagine not contacting or welcoming any member of my family.
It's how you treat people and respond to them that makes the relationships grow.

Well my family isnt very family orientated lol, I've seen my youngee bros twice this year, my sister and dad three times and my oldee bro a massive five times, my mum once, and we spent the first half an hour ignoring each other, so I do wonder whether because of that it makes me want to contact her more, and whether because of that I shouldn't, but who knows it does though feel wierd having someone related out there but not knowing them, the half sister I grew up with and me hated each other but now we live so far away me and Sarah (real name Lucy) get on well enough to go drinking with each other without getting in a fight but I do wonder whether all that does have a impact in why I want to do this as I said, but then by messenging her once with all I know it will be up to her as to whether or not she wants to know me or not, although Im sure both outcomes could be awkard for a while at least, I just wanna know what Im planning on saying and getting that right first.