Thank you girls I'm chuffed to bits really I am. I know there's a long way to go but at least I have seen a glimmer of hope. Didn't get much training done yesterday as had the family over for dinner and today of course we have shopping and agility class, plus taking her for her walk this morning. It's finding the time to dedicate to it but I must try and do some today or I'll lose the ground I've made.

Helena you are quite right you clever girl. I knew that it was a matter of making them lose interest in what we are doing but we were doing it say once every 30mins. It wasn't until I actually just paced up and down continually that it had any effect.

*grabs magic bottle and pours a vatful into a magic glass

Well, Jimmi is doing really well girls and barely raises an eyebrow now when I go out and leave him with husband - and he is generally so calm and happy with his daily routine that I am thrilled to bits; but there is a big cloud looming on my horizon.

If you remember we all agreed that when husband and I go up to see my very elderly father in Yorkshire it would be best to take Jimmi with us, especially as he is happy to be in the car. Well........I have been outvoted, and actually now probably think that the family is right. The thing is, Jimmi would have to be in the car for an awful long time (journey up there; whilst we were taking my father to lunch etc. etc. then back home again the next day,) and coupled with that is the problem with his paws - if we have to walk him along lots of pavements before finding grass then they will definitely suffer. All in all, it will be stressful and difficult.

Daughter, husband and grandson are happy to come here to look after him, and I know that they will do a good job but oh I am such a hopeless worrier! This little dog has come so far since arriving as a pathetic worried itchy confused chap nearly 8 months ago, and now that he has finally "come right" in so many ways I am fretting that two days and one night of our absence might set him back. Am I being totally ridiculous??
Just to illustrate the change in him:

This is just after arrival - horrendous sore paws, ears and pink skin; turning his back on the world!



Now compare this recent one:



He is a different dog.

Oh heck - I swore to myself that this time I would be different and not stress unduly; how do these animals get so quickly into one's heart?

Goodness what a difference Bitkin - he is now looking so much happier and healthier than in the first picture!

Maybe he won't be as bad as you think when you go away. You know you are leaving him in very safe hands and you aren't going to be away for that long so if I were you I would try not to worry too much. No doubt you will be ringing home to find out how he is but you never know he may just enjoy the company and all the spoiling he is bound to get!

Bitkin, he's gorgeous and looks happy and healthy now. I don't know what to say about your dilemna, I can see why your family say you should leave him but I can fully understand why you don't want to.

He'll still be in his own home and have your daughter and family for company who he knows well. He's been left with them before. Is it possible to leave him with your daughter on a few occasions before you have to visit your dad. Both you and your husband going out. I know you've done it before but not sure for how long. Could you try for quite a few hours and build it up to a full day so it won't come as a shock when you're not back within an hour or two?

Thanks Cardaph and 1cutedog - you are both such a tonic and so helpful. It's so good to be able to discuss these things with people who understand the problems!

Yes, we are already arranging for daughter and co to come and stay overnight for a trial session before we actually go away. She will do all the feeding etc., and we will go out for several hours on both days either side. With luck this will make it much less of a big thing when we disappear to see my father.

Okay, enough about Jimmi - how are Bessie and Lana coming along?

Yes it's so good to have people you can talk to that are going through the same problems. Most other folk just can't understand can they.

Nothing much to report on Bessie this week, the behaviourist said to work on each stage for a full week at a time so we are still at the going to the front door and opening and closing it. She will follow a few times but gets sick quickly now and lies down. I want to get to the stage where she doesn't follow us at all before moving on.

A bit of fun tomorrow we are going to a local dog show and have entered Bessie into The Waggiest Tale and Prettiest Bitch ! Be good mental stimulation for her with all the people and other dogs around.

I hope the trial run of leaving Jimmi goes well let us know how he does, keeping my fingers crossed for you

Oooh.........our Bessie is going to a show tomorrow! If she doesn't win something then I will take the judges behind the hospitality tent for a lesson in choosing their winners correctly

It's a long hard road this training for leaving our dogs alone, no matter which route we take. As long as we all get there in the end, that is all that matters.

Good luck for tomorrow!!

Hi girls Just catching up

Bitkin, I'm sure Jimmi will be absolutely fine with your family whilst you go and see your dad, and personally I think it's far better for him to be in the surroundings he knows, with people he knows, rather than being left for long hours in that car even though he likes his car. He's come such a long way in those piccies hasn't he, bless his heart, lying there in the lap of luxury in his own soft, fleecy bed, he knows it's his, same as he knows you are his and he now knows you have to keep going out but you will always come back. He sounds just like my Georgie was when I first rescued him, coz he was an itchy, red, sore dog who didn't know where he belonged either, and it took weeks and weeks for him to finally realise he was here to stay, and I always came home, even though at that time I had my other dog to keep him company. If the truth's known, he even stresses now (according to hubby) when I go off out with Zena, although when I leave the house, he gives me the impression he couldn't care less coz he has his fish stick, but I'm sure he stresses a bit, and I've had him now for 6 years! Gone are the days where he gets so stressed that he chews himself to bits thank goodness, but he still doesn't like it when I go out and leave him home alone, but it's down to an acceptable level for both of us now, so let's hope that's now the case with Jimmi. The difference being, Jimmi won't be home alone, he'll have half the family there, and I'm sure they're going to make a really big fuss of him, he will forget all about you going awol without him, until your return, and he's then going to go crazy when you come through that door. Look at it this way, this is going to be the absolute ultimate test for him isn't it, and it will only help to instil into his mind that even if you're gone for one, or two days, let alone the usual hour or so, you will always, always come back through that door.... eventually! Yes, this is going to be a really good test, although be prepared for him to stick to you like glue for a couple of days when you do get back coz that's just what Georgie did with me whenever we went away for a couple of days leaving him with our dogsitter. Awwww, so glad to hear he's settled down so well, but I didn't expect any less of him.

Good luck with Bessie at the show tomorrow, I hope she's a little star for you and wins all the rosettes Great to hear you're doing a bit of agility with her now as well as training, it'll give her something else to think about and tire her out suitably for your little outings without her - are you still in your slippers though? Lol!

It is good to talk it through. When I first started this thread I felt at my wits end and was beginning to feel imprisoned and to resent Lana but just being able to talk about it on here has made an awful difference.

I did have a problem going to the post office, queues are always miles long and waiting time can be 1/2 an hour or more. I didn't like leaving Lana tied up outside so had a look online and can now buy my postage there and print out the slips. Brilliant idea. Cardaph you could try that too

It's a bit of faffing about but the PO is too far away and too long to wait to leave Lana on her own at home and the same for leaving her tied outside. I have to keep asking people to hold my place in the queue while I run out and check on her. The longest I've waited is 15 minutes and that was only once, then I've given up and taken my stuff home again

I've only been up and down the stairs a couple of times and Lana was fine, I try and keep my shoes or boots on after we've been for our morning walk so I'm not changing footwear. I might do it next week when the postman is due and come up the stairs after him, see if Lana is barking when she hears him. If she does bark I will speak loudly to him so she knows I'm there, see if it makes her stop, if she doesn't bark I will be very quiet. I'll explain to the poor postie before we start off or he'll wonder what I'm up to

Cardaph hope Bessie wins a prize tomorrow. Lana could certainly get it for waggiest tale and although I am her mummy and love her dearly I don't think she could get prettiest bitch. oh what an awful thing to say I could win the one just for being a bitch ha ha

Bitkin hope it goes well when your daughter comes to stay for the night and that Jimmi settles well with her.

Helena, it is always so good to have your input, thank you thank you thank you! As 1cutedog says, this thread has been such a lifeline.

I am typing with great difficulty as jimmi is sprawled on my lap with his head and paws pinning down my left hand, but he has not been well today so i am giving him extra attention.

1cutedog, I think that most of us in this position are guilty of feeling less than charitable towards our respective dogs when we feel utterly tied, and you must feel it more than most as you are dealing with it on your own. I must say that you are doing a fantastic job finding your way around different problems and sometimes I dearly wish that we lived close by so that we could help out. If I find myself becoming a little down because I cannot do simple things like going with husband to Hereford or wherever, or even strolling around town together (cannot take Jimmi cos of all the pavement work on his paws) then I focus on all his good points, and the joy that he brings in other ways.

Actually he has been a little poorly today, and it made me realise just how much I now love him, little pea brain that he is. I felt so frustrated because I know all the stuff about feeding bland food such as chicken or rice but he can have neither of those things, and I just have to hope that his salmon and potato plus fish sticks are bland enough foods in themselves!

Cardaph, get yourself in here as soon as you can to let us know how many rosettes Bessie wins!