Thanks to everyone who responded to my difficult time. I have decided to go at least one step more. I have decided that I am going to go for the consultation at the Specialist Hospital. It's only an hour away, & I'm sure they know more than the Vets in my area. If they cannot give me definate answers about the outcome with surgery, then I am going to go no further.

I keep thinking that maybe it's not as bad as it looks, & maybe I will get good news. I will not put her through any surgery, unless the outlook is good. I will have to accept it, if they tell me there is nothing they can do, or the chances of her being normal again is slim. Please say a prayer for her. Cinder would give you a loving lick, if she could.

Thanks again to everyone here. Thanks for being here when I needed a friend(s)to talk to.
Patti~
Here is a pic of my Cinder:

Here is a pic of Cinder & Cassie:

Good luck Patti at the specialist's consultation, we will all be sending positive vibes for you and Cinder x

Lovely pictures, they both are sweet little dogs

Theres no right answer here, though im not sure if i would put your dog through surgery, some vets are quick to reccomend trying stuff out at the dogs (& ours) expense.

We had one vet who WAS a Amazing surgeron, hed try anything out, he had lots of successes tbf, but also some not so good.

I think with dogs it can come down to, "am i keeping this dog going for myself or for the dog"

I couldn't agree more with that. That's exactly what went through my mind watching my poor dog going downhill, and quite honestly, it was not only prolonging HER agony, but mine also, when I knew I was going to lose her anyway, be it a week or be it a month.

I wish you all the best of luck in the World with Cinder at the specialists today, and I hope you make the right decision for HER, you have to put aside your own pain, but I think you already know this don't you. The specialist will hopefully tell you all you want to know, but I'm guessing it probably won't be the words you want to hear. My heart is going out to you again, I know how painful this is for you, it's still raw for me and it's been 8 months now. Sometimes we have to find a tremendous amount of strength to do something which goes totally against our idea of loving something or someone, but you just have to find it deep inside, and you will, I know you will and do what you know is right for her, you wouldn't want to see her in pain I know that much.

One thing I will mention here is something the lovely lady vet said to me when she came out that terrible night for my dear old girl. I was in shreds as you can imagine, but was somehow very calm and strong and I looked at her and asked her if she thought I was doing the right thing, to which she replied "oh yes, most definitely, it's definitely her time. You wouldn't believe what we have to see sometimes when people just can't let go. With cancer it is the most agonising death for them once it gets to the nerves and into the blood stream, and luckily you have caught it before that time and can let her go relatively painfree". Now I know at the time it made me feel so awful thinking that there might still be some time left, BUT, even though I beat myself up about it for a very long time afterwards, I have now come to terms with the fact that I just KNOW I did right by not letting her suffer as she most definitely would have done. What would another 2 weeks have meant for me if I had let her carry on? An emergency phone call to the vet, whilst watching her writhe in agony perhaps? I don't know and I never will, but at least I was given a chance to make the right decision for HER.

I hope you will ask the question to this specialist whether or not he personally thinks it IS her time or maybe not, and if he says it is, then you're going to have to do some very hard thinking for your little Cinders so you don't let her suffer in any way. Easier said than done I know. We're always here for you no matter what you're feeling, please post it up and we'll give you the support and kindness you need at this hard time. Take care.xxxx

I thought I would update those of you who wrote me about my little Cinder needing surgery. I did make an appointment to take Cinder to a specialist, to see if she could be helped, but, I ended up canceling it. It was a hard decision, & I'm still not certain if it was the right one, but; my family & I over Easter, discussed it; & they all said to not put Cinder through any surgery at her age. They feel it will be too much on her & will only cause her more suffering. She is still eating good, going outside to the bathroom, & still enjoys her treats. I feel she is not suffering, as of yet, & when it is time; she will let me know.

Cinder & I did have an accident last night. I was carrying Cinder in my arms, to take her outside to the bathroom. I have a split-entry home. And, as I was going down the steps, my feet went out from under me, & we fell down three steps. It happened so fast! I saw Cinder go on her back, her head going back, & her four legs, reaching straight up in the air, as I tried my best to hold on to her. I remember yelling, Oh my God, Cinder! I thought I had hurt her. I don't know how I did it, but; I was able to hold on to her. She is fine, but I am totally bruised on my rump. I have never ever fallen so hard in all my days! I have to say that I cried, & slept with an icebag all night. I am still sore, & I know it will be awhile before the bruising is all gone. I am just so thankful that my Cinder wasn't hurt.

I am going to dread the time when it comes for Cinder to depart from us. I cry alot everytime I think about it. I did have hope that she might get better on her own, but that hope is gone. I will miss her & I know how much that is going to hurt. The pain I am in from the fall, will be nothing compaired to losing Cinder. I am trying to prepare myself, but, nothing I can do or say to myself, will make it any easier. Everytime I hold her, I wonder, how many more times do I have left to feel her in my arms. I tell her, how much I love her & how much I am going to miss her. I don't know if she understands. I tell Cassie, my other dog, that Cinder will probably not be with us much longer. I tell her that it will be just me & her. I am afraid that Cassie will feel more pain than me, & if she will be able to cope without Cinder. She will be by herself, when my husband & I leave the house, & she is not use to that. I just hope she will be ok with it.

That's all for now. Thanks again to everyone for your support.
Patti~

In my opinion an 11yr old small dog, I would put through surgery if it was going to giver her a decent length of life afterwards, if it had been a large dog I would say no.

From the view of someone who did leave it a day too late rather than a day too soon; don't do it. You can NEVER rid yourself of that guilt, and it just isn't fair to the dog.
With our old JRT girly; everything was starting to go..she was in reality a lot older than we had perceived; her heart was slowly worsening, her arthritus was becoming "cripling", and the vet had the theory that after all the years of being on meds for this and that her kidneys and liver were starting to fail. She was coming to the end of the road, and highly miserable. She'd started to mess the house which was no problem to us; but she always seem "ashamed". She'd started to very violently bite people, only when touched in certain areas-obviously due to pain, and she was just miserable. But we couldn't do it, the vet advised us too, everyone did, but we couldn't...blood test after blood test to see if there was any change, test after test to see if there was any sign of "positiveness" just to give us some hope.
It reached a day she had a stroke; again, and was very "odd" when coming round in the fact she never really did..so the decision was made for us when we rang the vet, it was horrible.
Never leave it that long, well I wouldn't.
As others have said, it's a very personal thing.

Would have thought an 11 year old Pom would have the expectation of a good few years life left and if the current problem is causing her distress then I think I would chance an operation.

Have owned a 11year old Elkhound who had bloat, she faced 4 operations in 5 days and came bouncing through to live a happy life till she was nearly 15.

Sorry to hear about your fall, that must have scared you with Cinder in your arms let alone the pain you must be in now.

I know you'll make the decision when the time comes, but I must say, I totally agree with the decision you have already made not to put her through surgery, you must have discussed it thoroughly with your vet and they always know best at times like this. As I said before though, please don't let her suffer in any pain, there really is no point prolonging her agony let alone yours if it is her time to go, and only you will know that like I have so many times in the past. It's all down to quality of life and their dignity of course, it has nothing to do with how upset or heartbroken we feel coz we're going to get that anyway no matter how long we try and hang on. I'm truly hoping your little Cinder might actually make the decision for you as one of ours did many years ago and you never know. We'll all be here for you as always when the time comes. I hope you're recovering from that nasty fall and are not in too much pain. Take care.xxx

Sorry to hear of your fall. However don't know if this helps, but my old girl Meg (Border Collie) went through a operation at 16yrs...she jumped down a small bank and landed on a broken bottle which went threw her leg...and she went on to 23 yrs old. I hope you speak to the specialist and get some answers.