Arrrrrrhhhhhhhh, you are starting to really irritate me Jackbox, why don't you get a life, instead of picking up on everything I say. Like I said, I hope one day I get to meet you in real life. Something tells me you wouldn't have quite so much to say without a pc in front of you

The private messages had to be printed. I have made sure I printed messages that could not identify the person that sent the pm, also those people are not around much (if at all) any more, to my knowledge. I could have quoted a whole lot more but couldn't be bothered. The point was made.

WHEN SOMEONE HAS CALLED ME A LIAR (when someone asks for an explanation as to how I can be pm'd - I call that questioning my word - in other words, calling me a liar). To me, someone is "new" when they are relatively new to a site. The fact that they have made 20 posts does not make them an established member of the Forum. I would say that until a person has been around for some weeks, got the feel of the site and so on, I will treat them as a new member. You Jackbox, you treat most with the same attitude. Just shoving your views down peoples' throats, even when they are not welcome. Now, stop all your rubbish. If you want to have a go with me, take it to pm but, be prepared, I've had you up to my eyeballs and you might not like what you hear I imagine you won't do that though, you like to hide in your little clique, don't you. Yes, I've got your number

*yawn* - Sorry, fingers are sore from replying to pointless posts

You got that right

Re the mods posting opinions, i think that was in response to me saying what is done on another forum i use. Just to clarify, the moderators on that forum ARE allowed to post their opinions, of course. They give very good advice, they are very well qualified and experts in the areas in which they moderate on the forum so of course they post, and they do give their opinions

However, the moderators do not get involved in this sort of discussion and do not take sides (not saying thats whats happened here, but it has been discussed...), they would just come on, close the thread for admin to review as Carole did.

Im not saying either way is right or wrong. It is nice in a way, for the mods to be friendly so you can think of them as normal people But that forum went through the same problems as this, certain members repeatedly picking on others (no one can deny that happens!!), moderators getting involved in heated discussions and not having a good record of new members staying around. It was decided that more strict moderating was required and for that forum it worked

I do think the mods do a good job on this forum on the whole. This is by far the most volatile forum i use. I am a regular on several forums and they all have their issues and "cliques", but it tends to only flare up in a big argument every few months on those forums, sadly, in recent months, it seems there are always several threads on the go that just degenerate into name calling and nastiness (the NI threads are the first that come to mind, i feel sorry for any NI owners on here....) which i think, IMO, is an issue... I dont know what can be done about it, but it is definately a problem...


Anyway, sorry for waffling. Just wanted to clarify what i was saying, and that i did not mean that mods shouldnt be allowed to voice an opinion

CC, now you're not doing yourself any favours at all. I've already told you that you can disagree with a mod in the context of a discussion - why on earth would we not allow that. It would be plain silly and the forum would die practically overnight.

However you must treat our Mods (and members for that matter) with the respect and courtesy they deserve, and if you have a problem with a moderator action (ie with regards to actual mod duties) then you use the feedback section to contact admin.

Now going by some of your posts here, I would just say calm down, and stop taking everything so personally. People are posting their opinion just like you are - only you seem to be coming across as irrational and irate.

With regards to 'new' members feeling humiliated, well sometimes we do things that we should be ashamed of, and it's not everyone else's fault to have to inadvertently point that out. One example is having an accidental litter. It is the owners job to make sure that doesn't happen. Another is purposely breeding a dog without good reason - so many dogs are put to sleep every year, we don't need people breeding unnecessarily to add to the problem. Take a quick look at this article to see why: Thinking about breeding? Think about this... (and those are just quick examples).

When it comes to the welfare of dogs, we can't allow ourselves to ignore what's happened - people need to know how serious things are, and while we may try to be as nice as possible, in these circumstances it's almost impossible for the person not to feel a little humiliated... but that's because they did something shameful to begin with. And really, they should acknowledge and accept responsibility of their actions, learn from our mistakes and move on.

I've sent a PM to CC once or twice about how horrid I think some threads have got and how nasty some posters appear. It's absolutely true on some occasions.

However, I agree CC my little munchkin that it's time to just step back from this thread now. You've made your point, you've said everything you wanted but it's going nowhere. Don't turn into what you've just been saying you don't like. Be the better person and walk away now.

For sure, me know more ;o)

Do you know what Azz, I wasn't trying to do myself any favours. I was standing up for myself against your Mod who felt fit to quote me - no end! I'm glad she has time to do this. Maybe that explains her fixation on me. Too much time on her hands.

As for the other member, that I've laid it on the line to, well she just doesn't seem to know when to let it be. I'm not backing down to the likes of these people. Even if it suits you. Ban me for defending myself. The privilege is yours. It will only support what many Members feel, that fairness on this site is diminishing, rapidly.

I have a right to defend myself. I had hoped you were different but reading your last post, you are not.

You feel it's the responsibility of this site to condemn people for mistakes *shocking*! That new members are supposed to accept responsibility and move on. Get real for goodness sake. You can see what is happening here of late. People are being judged unfairly and running for the hills. Does that help anybody, including the litters/dogs/pups whatever, that they came to seek advice for. People need to get off their high horse, stop preaching and thinking they are perfect and get REAL!!!!!

Anyway, I'm not going to try to justify why I've said what I said. Mini made a massive post, quoting just about everything I've said in the last days, so I am supposed to keep my mouth shut. No Azz. If Mini had came to me in PM, discussed the problem with me, all would have been well. Instead she tries to prove points on the thread. I have a right to defend myself when someone is constantly digging at me. Would you like to be quoted, quoted and quoted some more and not be able to defend yourself.....................I think not!

I get you, Pidge. I really do! I just don't like people to think they can get away with murder, which some clearly are! I've been hung out to dry, because I've stood up to the bullies on this site. Still you're right, I can be the better person and walk away. I've said all I've got to say on the matter Except, how can you be sure, you know more

I'm surprised this thread was reopened, it got way off track a while ago.

But, it has shown how people can be affected by what others post on a forum. CC's obvious (to me) distress and frustration shows how people can be adversley affected by what someone she has never even seen before posts on the internet.

I'm reading a book of essays by Adam Phillips about psychoanalysis. The main premise of psychoanalysis is that what is important is said by mistake (i.e. Freudian slips are our way of saying unacceptable things). I'm now wondering if forums are a form of Freudian slip

Anyhoo, I don't think there's much left to say apart from it seems that some people feel they are responsible for what they post and think about how it affects the readers.

Some don't.

That's life

I don't use MSN or social networking sites partly because Im too old and low-tech but also because it is so easy to be ambiguous and cause offence even with people you know. 80% of communication is non-verbal which means we rely mainly on other cues to get the true meaning of what is being said. On a forum you dont have those non-verbal cues so its really easy to misinterpret the tone, emphasis or even whole meaning of what is being said.