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Location: Australia
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 733
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Red Neck Guide
REDNECK GUIDE TO MEDICAL TERMS
BENIGN--------------------------What you be after you be eight
ARTERY--------------------------The study of paintings
BACTERIA------------------------Back door to the cafeteria
BARIUM--------------------------What doctors do when patients die
CESAREAN SECTION-----------A neighborhood in Rome
CAT-SCAN------------------------Searching for kitty
CAUTERIZE-----------------------Made eye contact with her
COLIC-----------------------------A sheep dog
COMA------------------------------Punctuation mark
D&C--------------------------------Where Washington is
DILATE----------------------------To live long
ENEMA----------------------------Not a friend
FESTER----------------------------Quicker than someone else
FIBULA----------------------------A small lie
GENITAL--------------------------Non-Jewish person
G.I. SERIES-----------------------World Series of military baseball
HANGNAIL-----------------------What you hang your coat on
IMPOTENT------------------------Distinguished or well-known
LABOR PAIN----------------------Getting hurt at work
MEDICAL STAFF-----------------Doctors' cane
MORBID---------------------------A higher offer than I bid
NITRATES------------------------Cheaper than day rates
NODE------------------------------I knew it
OUTPATIENT---------------------A person who has fainted
PAP SMEAR------------------------A fatherhood test
PELVIS-----------------------------Second cousin to Elvis
POST OPERATIVE----------------A letter carrier
RECOVERY ROOM-----------------Place to do upholstery
RECTUM----------------------------Damn near killed him
SECRETION-----------------------Hiding something
SEIZURE---------------------------Roman emperor
TABLET----------------------------A small table
TERMINAL ILLNESS-------------Getting sick at the airport
TUMOR-----------------------------More than one
URINE------------------------------Opposite of you're out
VARICOSE-------------------------Near or close by