My OH's 25th

I am uber annoyed.

It is Adie's 25th next Friday so I've text his friends asking them what they thought we should do.

I got a text back, not sure whether it was Sam or her BF, but it said "Why not have a lads night out at a strip club" - urm next joke.

Then it was

"Well I was being serious but we could always stay in and hire some entertainment"

Sorry but it's my OH's 25th and I don't want to spend it watching him gawp at women take their clothes off. In fact a couple of Christmasses ago, the Christmas outing suggestion by everyone but me - was going to a strip club. We didn't go.

I'm sorry but I am not going to pay to see my OH stare at women take their clothes off, I don't care if it's his 25th. I don't care if it's something to be admired or whatever people say pole dancing and stripping is, I can take my clothes off an do a stupid dance whilst doing it...I don't want to do it in public or feel the need to make money that way either - I have a brain and that's how I'm going to be remembered and how I am going to make my money.

Adie knows I don't like it - I have said he could go but he said he didn't want to go if I wasn't going - so looks like he'll never get to go to a stripclub, which he seems fine about btw.

UGH some people.
I'm sorry if you do this for a living or knows someone who does, but I don't like the idea, all those years and everything fighting for rights and women still want to be portrayed as sexual objects instead of women - I don't get it.

Patrick had a strippergram for his 50th (7 years back) that I got him...well only down to her leather undies, but all his mates were telling him '''what a fantastic wife you have'' made me feel proud that they all felt I was 'cool'
On the way home (early hours) he said....you know what, she was a smasher.....but she isn't a patch on you

Its a age thing I know Im 'old' and past the worrying stage, but I would rather be with him when things like that happen after all most of these girls wouldn't really give these guys a second glance, alot have families/BF/children of thier own, and Im sure your BF is proud to have you on his arm

Why not just get a night out at a curry house or something .... they can be fun with all the jokes etc.,

I wish I could be like you, but I'm not. I don't get it, I don't like the idea of it. We had a couple of issues lately that's caused me to have a wobble..but nothing serious, just annoying and a bit hurtful.

And to be fair - I don't like the idea of watching a strange woman strip off in front of me and my OH - and I know for a fact his friends would go on about it for at least 3 weeks after - cos they know it winds me up.

I just got a text - after half an hour since their last text since I didn't reply saying:

"Only joking, how about a meal"

But to be fair there's joking and there's taking it too far, they know how I feel about it all, so why even bother to wind me up. My really close friends don't even do that and they know worse things to wind me up with. So I don't know - might just stay at home and tell him - you go out, do whatever, I'll stay at home, order in and eat Ben and Jerry's with the dogs and watch a movie.

Ugh I don't know - I want him to be happy, but he won't be happy if I'm miserable, and if that's what their going to do then I'm not going to pretend I'm happy when I'm not.

Shoot me now!

I remember being your age and feeling just the same.
But there are things to remember, 1) he says 'come with me' hardly sounds like a guy that wants some-one else.
2) 'I wont go if you don;t want me too' how nice is that sounds a lovely bloke hun

By saying 'you go do what you want I'll stay here' you will automatically spoil his birthday.
Why not just suggest a night out (pictures, pub etc with his mates and GF's and followed by a meal, OK you may not want this but one night of smiles will be a lifetime of ''how wonderful is my GF'' memories

Well the problem with the meal is that we're already going for a family one on Saturday - as it is his brother's birthday on the 15th, we'll be going for a meal on the Monday too as it is valentines day. And there's only so many days I can starve myself so I can eat the portions that these places give here! So that leaves down town and after working in a club for a couple of weeks - now I know what happens in the back, it's put me off going drinking. I don't want to go out down town either cos it's always Adie who gets stuck with driving...I don't know we'll figure something out.

These are the same "friends" that bailed on my 19th because it was too short notice - I told them a month in advance what the plans were But they are his friends. My friends arranged a babysitter, changed shifts which meant doing a double shift in one day and one of my friends fell out with her BF because he doesn't particularly like me - she just said - She's my friend - I'm going.

Thanks anyway Steph - he can go when I'm "Old" like you, although you're not old, no one is! When I'm passed this stage. I'm 19 and he is my first proper relationship. I'm stubborn and it'll take a while to change my views on it all.
I'm going to try get some sleep now - not that I will cos he has fallen out with me cos I've said his friends weren't joking even though I know for a fact if I had said yes lets go for it - it wouldn't have been a joke at all.. I'm a girl, I know how these things work.

Im sure you will sort something out, maybe he has some ideas of what he would like to do

let us know how it goes, Im off to bed now.....maybe you could google....birthday ideas