The 2006 Version of "I Will Survive"
I hope this isn't a bit strong for in here
but I just got it in an e-mail and thought it was quite funny!
The 2006 version of I WILL SURVIVE
SING IT GIRLS!!! (maybe in your head, if you are reading this at work!)
Ready... set... go...
At first I was afraid, I was petrified.
When you said you had 10 inches, Lord I almost died!
But I'd spent so many years just waiting for a man that long,
That I grew strong,
And I knew that I could take you on...
But there you are, another lie,
I was ready for a Big Mac and you've brought me a French Fry!
I should have known that it was bull****, just a sad pathetic dream,
Should have known there was no Anaconda lurking in those jeans!
Go on now - go, walk out the door,
Don't you promise me 10 inches, then turn up with only 4!
Weren't you a brat to think I wouldn't find you out!?
Don't you know we're only joking when we say size don't count??!!
[Chorus]
I will survive! I will survive!
Cuz as long as I have batteries,
My sex life's gonna thrive!
I will always have good sex,
with a handful of latex!
I will survive! I will survive! ...Hey! Hey!
It took all my self control not to laugh out loud,
When I saw your little weiner standing tall and proud!
But to hell with your ego and to hell with all your needs,
Now I'm saving all my lovin' for a cordless multispeed!
[Chorus]
I will survive! I will survive!
Cuz as long as I have batteries,
My sex life's gonna thrive!
I will always have good sex,
With a handful of latex!
I will survive! I will survive! ...Hey! Hey!